Understanding the Gifted Perfectionist

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Understanding the Gifted Perfectionist
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Perfectionism

• On your paper draw a rough sketch of someone you
  know that is a perfectionist.
• List at least five characteristics that help you
  know that person has a tendency towards
  perfection.

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Perfectionism

• Dr. Miriam Adderholdt-Elliots book
  Perfectionism Whats Bad About Being Too Good?
  offers the following thoughts
• For most people, perfectionism isnt a big
  problem. It can be, however, for one group in
  particular, gifted kids.

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Perfectionism

• Whats the big deal anyway? Being a
  Perfectionist has never hurt anyone!
• According to Whitmore, 1980, The pressure towards
  perfection is the most overlooked, yet
  influential aspect of being gifted.

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Perfectionism

• A 1984 University of Georgia study of women
  students discovered the higher the perfectionism
  score, the lower the self-concept score.
• Type A behavior people have a greater than
  average chance of having high blood pressure,
  heart attacks and strokes.

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Perfectionism

• Perfectionism is part of being gifted.
• Expectations are extremely high for gifted
  students.
• School, society, family and self can contribute
  to the idea that peak performance should be the
  norm for students selected for gifted programs.
• Although it can breed excellence it can also be
  destructive, leading students to think that the
  only efforts worth making are those that end in
  perfect achievement.
• Delisle, pg. 34 Guiding the Social and Emotional
  Development of Gifted Youth

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Pursuit of Excellence vs. Perfectionism

• What do you think is the difference between a
  healthy pursuit of excellence and unhealthy
  perfectionism?
• The healthy pursuit of excellence is positive.
  Having ideals and high standards is good and
  needed to achieve great things.
• Here is what one student had to say

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Doing the research necessary for a term paper,
  working hard on it, turning it in on time and
  feeling good about it.
• Doing three drafts of a term paper, staying up
  two nights in a row and still handing your paper
  in late because you had to get it right- and
  still feeling bad about it.

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Studying for a test ahead of time, taking it with
  confidence, and feeling good about your score of
  96.
• Studying at the last minute(after three days of
  procrastination, taking the test with sweaty
  palms, and feeling depressed about your 96
  because a friend got a 98.

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Choosing to work on group projects because you
  enjoy leaning from the varied experience and
  approaches of different people.
• Always working alone because no one can do as
  good a job as you and youre not about to let
  anyone else slide by on your A

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Accepting an award with pride even though the
  engraver misspelled your name. (You know that it
  can be fixed later)
• Accepting the award resentfully because that dumb
  engraver didnt get your name right.

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Going out with people who are interesting,
  likeable and fun to be with.
• Refusing to go out with people who arent
  straight A students.

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Pursuit of Excellence Vs. Perfectionism

• Being willing to try new things, take risks,and
  learn from your experience and your mistakes.
• Avoiding new experiences because you are
  terrified of making mistakes.
• By the waydont say, We dont expect you to be
  perfect, we just expect you to do your best.
  Most of the time perfectionists think their best
  IS perfection.
• www.hoagiesgifted.org/perfectionHG.htm Shaun
  Hately

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Perfectionism

• Take the quiz in your handout to see if you have
  the tendency to be a perfectionist.
• Strongly Agree 2
• Agree Somewhat 1
• Cant Decide 0
• Disagree Somewhat 1
• Strongly Disagree -2

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Perfectionism

• If your total is between 15 and 20, youre
• TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE
• If your total is between 10 and 14, youre
• TOO GOOD FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.
• If your total is between 5 and 9, youre
• A BORDERLINE PERFECTIONIST
• If your total is between 1 and 4, youre a
• HEALTHY PURSUER OF EXCELLENCE
• If your total is between 0 and 5 youre
• USE TO HANGING LOOSE
• If your total is between 6 and 10, youre
• A LITTLE TOO RELAXED
• If your total is between 11 and 20, youre
• BARELY BREATHING

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Perfectionism

• A score of 20 indicates a high degree of
  perfectionism
• Half of the general population is between 2 and
  16

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Perfectionism

•  
•  Perfectionism is a result of social learning
  that occurs in childhood. Families and teachers
  reward the eager beaver.
•  Usually first born children
• (more firstborns are also identified as gifted
  and talented)
•      Seems hereditary because it seems to pass
  from one generation to the next.

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Perfectionism

• The Superkid syndrome we hothouse our
  preschoolers. Just like raising a flower in a
  green house we try to give them more at an
  earlier age. No time for creative thinkingtoo
  much is scheduled in.
• Workaholic kids rewarded for the things they
  do, not for the personal qualities they are
  developing.
• Media says everything and everyone is perfect.

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Perfectionism

• CONSEQUENCES
• Mood Swings
• Quantity of achievements is more important than
  the quality
• Telescoping magnify goals you havent met,
  minify goals you have already accomplished so
  they seem insignificant

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Perfectionism

• Consequences (Continued)
• Too focused on the future
• Must get it right-no room to fail
• Procrastination if it cant be perfect you put
  it off

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Perfectionism

• So now what do we do to help students who are
  being crippled by perfectionism?

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Perfectionism

• Appreciate the trait! Share with your children
  that you have often felt the same way and how you
  have dealt with your feelings. Perfectionism can
  lead to the healthy pursuit of excellence.
• Be careful how you talk to your child. Part of
  giftedness is extra sensitivity. They do not
  hear your compliments and your helpful words
  are painful and cause them to focus them on what
  is wrong.

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Perfectionism

• How to Combat Procrastination
• As Mae West states
• He Who Hesitates is Last

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Perfectionism

• How to Combat Procrastination
• Procrastinators
• Do not start projects for fear of failing.
• Do not hand in a finished project because it is
  not good enough.
• Start so many projects there isnt time to
  complete any of them.
• Are afraid to take risks

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Perfectionism

• How to Combat Procrastination
• What do you do to help procrastinators?

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Perfectionism

• How to Combat Procrastination
• Keep a To-Do List and rank order what is most
  important to complete. List the amount of time
  you think it will take.
• Set goals.
• Begin your day with the most difficult task, the
  rest of the day will be easy in comparison.
• Remove distractions from your study area.
  (Example, T.V., radio, magazines)
• Develop a support system

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Perfectionism

• Talk About It
• One of the best ways to combat perfectionism is
  to share your stress with a parent, peer, teacher
  or counselor. Use a support system to help keep
  you focused on your goals but also have fun.

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Perfectionism

• Savor Your Success
• Perfectionist are usually so busy they dont take
  time to savor their success.
• Plan a reward for everything you accomplish
  whether it is large or small. (Example I
  handed my paper in on time so I get a new book)
• Accept compliments and praise yourself!

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Perfectionism

• Schedule time to have fun together as a family.
  Another strategy is to have your child walk with
  you for 30 minutes every other day. After the
  initial resistance, you will find they love the
  exercise and begin to talk to you about what is
  going on in their life.

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• Understanding the Gifted Underachiever

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Underachievement

• Draw a picture of an underachiever. It could be a
  friend, student, neighbor, relation, etc.
• List characteristics the person has that lets you
  know he/she is underachieving.

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Underachievement

• What is your definition of underachievement?

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Underachievement

• When a child has a high I.Q. and low grades in
  school (Ziv)
• One whose achievement score is lower than his/her
  ability score. (Kowitz)
• The discrepancy between the childs school
  performance and some index of his/her actual
  ability. Ability can be defined by a test or by
  observing the child at home or at school.(Rimm)
• A student who is not working up to his/her
  potential. (Coil)

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Underachievement

• Jim Delisle offers a broader definition that
  focuses more on behaviors.
• According to Delisle, a precise definition like
  those given on the previous page do not always
  fit every child.

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Underachievement

• According to Jim Delisle..
• Underachievement is content and situation
  specific.
• Underachievement is in the eye of the beholder.
• Underachievement is tied intimately to
  self-concept development.

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Underachievement

• According to Jim Delisle (cont).
• Underachievement implies that adults disapprove
  of a childs behavior.
• Underachievement is a learned set of behaviors.

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Underachievement

• Signs usually begin in third/fourth grade.
  Middle school or junior high usually marks the
  highest point of consistent underachievement.
• Some reverse in high school, but most continue
  the pattern into adulthood.
• The earlier you intervene the better.

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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producer

• The scary reality
• In a review of 30 years worth of research studies
  on underachievement, Raph and Tannenbaum reported
  that of the studies they analyzed they did not
  find one unified explanation of the phenomenon of
  underachievement. Asbury and Ziv concurs that
  their were no specific psychosocial factors seen
  consistently associated with underachievement.

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Underachievement

• Dr. Sylvia Rimm asks the following questions of
  parents. Score 1 point for each YES response.
• 1. Was my child the center of an unusual amount
  of attention for the first three years of his/her
  life?
• 2. Were my childs parents divorced before
  he/she was a teenager?
• 3. Did my child have many health problems as a
  preschooler?

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Underachievement

• 4. Does my child have a same gender sibling who
  is less than three years younger or older than
  he/she?
• 5. Does my child want a lot of one-to-one
  attention?

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Underachievement

• Scoring
• 4-5 points The child encountered very serious
  risks for underachievement.
• 2-3 The child encountered fairly serious risks
  for underachievement.
• 1 The child encountered only minor risks for
  underachievement.
• 0 Indicates no obvious risk factors that would
  lead to underachievement.

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Underachievement

• Are there different types of underachievers?
• Perfectionist Pearl
• Passive Paul
• Sick Sam
• Taunted Terrance
• Torn Tommy
• Jock Jack, Social Sally, Dramatic Dick
• Academic Alice
• Manipulative Mary
• Creative Chris
• Rebellious Rebecca
• Hyperactive Harry
• Bully Bob

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Underachievement

• Early Risks
• There is nothing in research that suggests
  underachievement is inherited. We must look at
  LEARNED behaviors.
• Usually initiate the habits very early, before
  entering school.

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Underachievement

• Early Risks
• Environmental Factors that COULD lead to
  underachievement
• The unwelcome child
• The overwelcome child
• Early health problems
• Particular Sibling Combinations
• Specific Parenting Relationships
• The Gifted Child

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Underachievement

• Parents play a major role in underachievement.

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Underachievement

• Can the school make a difference?
• YES!!

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Underachievement

• Structure
• A teacher who has a loosely organized classroom
  can cause underachievers to flounder.
• A teacher who is too rigid can also cause
  problems with underachievers getting into a power
  struggle.

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Underachievement

• Competition
• Underachievers do not cope with competition well.
• Avoid open announcements of grades.
• Public criticism of a childs work.
• Comparison of class papers.
• Look of surprise if a student does well.

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Underachievement

• Competition
• Do encourage individual performance evaluation.
• Group or team competition is fine as long as one
  child isnt singled out.
• Classroom contests against another classroom are
  best. It teaches students in a safe way how to
  win or lose.

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Underachievement

• Labeling
• The Pygmalion Effect
• A label of learning disabled can have a drastic
  effect on the childs achievement and self
  concept.
• 15 decrement in grades is the average impact.

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Underachievement

• Negative Attention
• If their home environment is dominated by
  manipulation then they will get attention in any
  way possible.
• Teacher who give negative attention is that they
  unintentionally help the student maintain his/her
  underachievement.
• The same thing can happen if the teacher is
  overly sympathetic to every hurt or call for help.

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Underachievement

• Boredom
• Make sure you know how to interpret the word.
• Schoolwork that is too easy is a frequent cause
  of underachievement in gifted children.
• Students learn they can coast through elementary
  grades. However, the first time they hit
  something challenging they find they have not
  learned how to study or persevere when the going
  gets tough.

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Underachievement
The Trifocal Model for Reversing Underachievement
Syndrome by Dr. Sylvia Rimm
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The Trifocal Model(Why Bright Kids Get Poor
Grades, pg. 162, Dr. Sylvia Rimm)
Assessment
Communication
Changing Expectations
Identification
Correction of Deficiencies
Modifications at Home or School
Conform/Nonconform Dependent
Conforming Dominant
Nonconforming Dominant
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Assessment

• What is the extent of the childs
  underachievement?
• This can be measured formally with a test or
  informally through observation.
• Identify if your student is conforming/nonconformi
  ng and dependent/nondependent.
• Can the parent or teacher resolve the issue or do
  you need professional help?

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Communications

• Parents, teachers and students need to work
  together.
• Track student progress to help them.
• Daily, weekly and monthly meetings are needed.
• It might not work to have the child take around
  the tracking sheet.

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Changing Expectations

• Parents, teachers, peers and siblings need to
  change their expectations.
• Expect gradual improvement, not a sudden leap.
• Set a clear road map.
• Adolescents benefit from hearing their I.Q.
  scores have decreased. It can be a great
  motivator.
• Do not overact to the first success.

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Identification

• Children need effective models to imitate.
• Think about the sources of the models.
• A volunteer or a mentor may be a good resource.

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Correction of Deficiencies

• This is the least difficult, but neglect it and
  the entire plan may fail.
• Address special skills deficits in each subject
  area.
• Tutors are useful, but they need to insist on
  independent problem solving.
• Practice the speeding exercise.

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Modifications at Home of School

• Select the most appropriate intervention for the
  type of child you have.
• Conforming/Nonconforming Dependent
• Conforming Dominant
• NonConforming Dominant

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Conforming and NonConforming Dependent

• You may have to change your intuitive response to
  help foster independence.
• Especially for boys make sure they have a same
  gender role model.
• Dependent children avoid competition so you need
  to help the learn how to compete.
• Teach social skills, deferred judgment.
• Have them do homework independently.
• Middle school students need to keep a weekly
  sheet indicating homework that is not completed.
  However, it works better if the child does not
  take around the sheet.

Parents can
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Conforming and NonConforming Dependent

• Give a vote of confidence.
• Record Instructions.
• Help the student complete classwork
  independently.
• Teach goal setting.
• Teach organization strategies.
• Teach students the rules of the grading game and
  link it to their personal control over test
  results.
• Facilitate social acceptance, have them tutor
  others.
• Be careful with punishments.

Teachers can
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Conforming Dominant

• These students rarely fail courses, they do just
  enough to get by.
• Monitor Counter-Identification
• Dominant children usually live in highly
  competitive families.
• Develop intrinsic motivation.
• Parent messages should be focused on the
  academic. Extra curricular activities are only
  important in that they help provide a full life.
• Teach them to be sensitive to others and accept
  criticism.

Parents can
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Conforming Dominant

• Provide challenge and help them to see they do
  not always have to be the first or be the best.
• If the child is not challenged, grade or subject
  acceleration may be needed.
• Dont criticize in front of peers. Sarcasm and
  humor do not work.
• Help with Intrinsic Motivation.
• Need lots of help to prepare for college.

Teachers can
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NonConforming Dominant

• Reverse early childhood dominance.
• Avoid confrontations
• Be careful of their emotional ups and downs
• Threats of suicide should always be taken
  seriously.
• Encourage time alone.
• Maintain the positive.
• Unite together to parent.
• Get professional help.

Parents can
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Nonconforming Dominant

• Form a Teacher-Student Alliance
• Dont Let Them Dominate the Class.
• Avoid Arguments.
• Channel their Energy and Give them an Audience.
• Avoid Student Manipulation.
• Change Academic Grouping
• Provide a Sanctuary.
• Group most likely to use Alcohol or Drugs.

Teacher can
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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producer

• Dr. Jim Delisle argues that definitions of
  underachievement are too limiting and seek to
  BLAME.
• Instead we should look at the difference between
  underachievers and non-producers.

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Underachievement Behaviors

• If underachievement is a behavior it can be
  changed. It is easier to change a behavior than
  an attitude.
• First, underachievement is content and situation
  specific. Many students who do not achieve in
  school succeed in outside activities or display a
  talent or interest in at least one school
  subject.
• Underachievement is in the eye of the beholder.
  For some students a B would be devastating while
  others would be happy with a C.

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Underachievement Behaviors

• Underachievement is tied to self image. A child
  who sees himself in terms of his own failures
  begins to place limits on what is possible. The
  end product is low self image.
• Underachievement implies that adults disapprove
  of a childs behavior. Students labeled
  underachievers know they are disappointing the
  adults in their lives and learn to assess their
  abilities relative to what they have not
  accomplished instead of what they are capable of
  doing.

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Underachievement Behaviors

• Underachievement is taught. Gifted children who
  receive unchallenging curriculum year after year
  learn to underachieve. Then, we blame them for
  the problem. Many highly able students are
  turned off to learning. One-size-fits-all
  doesnt work.

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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producer

• Underachiever(Jim Delisle, Guiding the Social and
  Emotional Development of Gifted Youth, pg. 121)
• Psychologically at risk
• Does not understand causes or cures
• Dependent and reactive
• Tends to withdraw
• Respects or fears authority figures
• Strong counseling program needed
• Needs both structure and imposed limits
• Performance uniformally weak
• Requires family intervention
• Change is long term
• Often perfectionistic
• Poor academic self concept

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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producers

• Non-Producer
• Mentally healthy
• Can explain both the problem and the possible
  solutions
• Independent and proactive
• Tends to rebel
• Sees teachers as adversariescontentious
• Counseling needs are minimal
• Requires little structure needs breathing room
• Performance varies relative to teacher and/or
  content
• Can be dealt with within school resources
• Change may occur overnight
• Frequently satisfied with accomplishments
• Sees self as academically able

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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producer

• Can you identify which student is the
  Non-Producer and which student is the
  Underachiever?

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Underachiever Vs. Non-Producer

• STEPHANIE (Delisle, pg. 119)
• Comments about Stephanie include that Stephanie
  is bright, but seems insecure about her ability
  to do well or she would be more successful in
  school if she only gave herself a chance. She
  seldoms causes trouble. She pursues her work
  with caution and says it is too hard for a
  stupid-head like me. She is her own worst
  enemy. When she receives a high mark she
  attributes it to being lucky. When she doesnt
  do well she calls herself dumb. She is quiet and
  would like to do better in school, but claims she
  cant. To the careful observer, Stephanie is a
  sad girl who seems to have little hope of ever
  being anything more than she is right now.

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Underachiever vs. Non-Producer

• MARK(Delisle, pg. 119)
• Mark is a student that every teacher hears about
  before the ever meet him and he is constantly
  talked about in the teachers lounge. His
  behavior and work are sporadic and he turns in
  his work when the mood strikes him. He dislikes
  busy work and teachers who assign it, but can
  and does succeed on projects that pique his
  interest. It is hard for teachers to assign
  grades. They know he knows the concept, but he
  refuses to turn in the work so how can they
  reward him with high grades. Getting high grades
  is of one of Marks personal goals. To the
  careful observer, Mark knows what he knows and he
  doesnt want to have to prove it through dumb
  assignments.

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Strategies to Help Underachievers and
Non-Producers

• Common denominators between both(Whitmore,
  1980).
• Supportive Strategies These affirm the worth of
  the child in the classroom and they convey the
  promise of success yet to be discovered and
  enjoyed.
• Intrinsic Strategies Intrinsic motivation
  through the childs discovery of rewards
  available as a result of efforts to learn,
  achieve and contribute to the group.
• Remedial Strategies These are employed to
  improve the students academic performance in an
  area in which he has evidenced difficulty
  learning, has experienced a sense of failure, and
  has become unmotivated to engage in learning
  tasks.

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Strategies to Help

• THE BOTTOM LINE.
• Put the child back in charge of his/her
  education.
• Only when the child feels academically capable
  and internally motivated to learn will school
  success occur.