DESCRIPTION

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• DESCRIPTION

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TRAITS

• Key Elements of a Descriptive Essay
• sense details (more than just sight)
• arranged spatially
• to support a Dominant Impression

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ASSIGNMENT

• To describe a familiar object utilizing
• only SENSE DETAILS
• -sight -taste
• -sound -touch
• -smell
• To describe only the physical characteristics
• To appeal to the senses to use concrete details

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TOPICS

• 1) Your dorm room or bedroom (the room in your
  home where you spend the most time)
• 2) Your automobile
• 3) The master bedroom in Edgar Allan Poes The
  Tell-Tale Heart

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PREWRITING
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PREWRITING

• 1) 5 SENSES
• make 5 lists (one for each sense)
• sight, smell, sound, taste, touch
• under each, list as many relevant details
  regarding your topic as possible

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PREWRITING

• 2) IMPRESSIONS
• from the previous lists, make connections
  between items on the previous lists
• group according to likeness
• that is, certain sense details are related by
  the impression that they create
• eerie
• messy
• feminine

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PREWRITING

• 3) DOMINANT IMPRESSION
• the longest list of impressions from the
  previous lists will be your dominant impression,
• the most striking impression concerning your
  object
• to this list add
• adjectives
• adverbs
• similes/metaphors

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PREWRITING

• 4) SYNONYMS
• Make a list of synonyms for your Dominant
  Impression
• Consult a thesaurus
• Tidy
• neat
• orderly
• organized
• uncluttered
• anal-retentive/obsessive-compulsive

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INTRODUCTION
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INTRODUCTION

• FUNNEL EFFECT
• Generalize 1st
• Introduce your topic
• Most people, Most college students
• Narrow your focus
• Some
• Others
• Focus on you
• Me
• End with Thesis Statement

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INTRODUCTIONFUNNEL EFFECT EXAMPLES

• 1) Owning a car these days is a necessity,
  especially for students at a community college.
  Looking around the parking lot at Luzerne County
  Community College, I usually see three types of
  cars the new, high-end graduation-gift cars,
  the modified sports cars, and the run-down first
  cars. Unfortunately, my car is one of the
  latter.... (thesis with clear Dominant
  Impression My gray 1986 Oldsmobile Omega is a
  Bondo Buggy, especially in terms of its exterior,
  interior, and trunk.)

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INTRODUCTIONFUNNEL EFFECT EXAMPLES

• 2) Most people have a place to go to feel
  refreshed when life gets too tough. (OR) Most
  people have a place they visit to get away from
  everyday life. It could be a car, a place in
  nature, or a room at home. For me it is my
  bedroom. (then comes the thesis with clearly
  stated Dominant Impression)

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Thesis Statement
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INTRODUCTIONTHESIS STATEMENT

• Comes at the end of the first paragraph (Funnel
  Effect)

TOPIC MAIN IDEA SUPPORT
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INTRODUCTIONTHESIS STATEMENT

• Example for Descriptive Essay
• My car is a junker in terms of its.
• Three aspects of my car that make it a junker are
  the front seat, the back seat, and the trunk.
• Contains the Dominant Impression and the 3
  aspects/parts of your object that support it.
• TOPIC MY CAR
• D.I. JUNKER
• SUPPORT (1) FRONT SEAT
• (2) BACK SEAT
• (3) TRUNK

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Dominant Impression
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INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION

• CHARACTERISTICS of a Dominant Impression
• ADJECTIVE or NOUN
• Declared in thesis statement
• Unifying or controlling aspect ambiance this
  will link all of your sense details.
• Without this, your details are like marbles
  without a jar.
• The first adjective that comes to mind when you
  think of your car.

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DOMINANT IMPRESSION
SENSE DETAIL
SENSE DETAIL
SENSE DETAIL
ALL SENSE DETAILS RELATE TO SUPPORT DOMINANT
IMPRESSION
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INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION

• HOW TO CREATE a Dominant Impression
• Write the 5 senses on a blank sheet of paper
  with room beneath each to write
• Then, list as many details that appeal to a
  particular sense under its name
• Go from the front of the car to the back from
  the outside to the inside
• Then, see which details are related to each
  other, that paint a similar picture of the
  object, and group them together
• What these details relate to will be your
  Dominant Impression.

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INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION EXAMPLES

• ROOM
• oasis of peace,
• tranquil refuge,
• feminine/masculine,
• reflects personality (you must briefly define
  your personality use the appropriate adjective
  before the word personality creative
  personality, artistic temperament),
• reflects my musical tastes,
• disaster area,
• pig sty

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INTRODUCTIONDOMINANT IMPRESSION EXAMPLES

• CAR
• total embarrassment, Bondo Buggy,
• off-road monster,
• Junk Mobile,
• typical college students (in terms of mess,
  neglect, ...),
• typical first car (in terms of price,
  efficiency...),
• The Black Beauty, The Polar Bear
• giant toy, sporty car, Daddys car,
• accessorized car (Pimp My Ride) (tricked out)

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BODY
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BODY

• 3 Body paragraphs
• (3 paragraphs 3 parts of your object)
• TOPIC SENTENCE
• starts each paragraph
• reiterates your thesis, Dominant Impression
• DESCRIPTION
• sense details, figurative language
• that supports only your Dominant Impression
• CLINCHER SENTENCE
• ends, wraps up the paragraph
• reiterates your Dominant Impression

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 1) DESCRIBEDO NOT LIST!!
• Describe items found in your car/room
• Lists do not describe lists are more exemplary
  than descriptive
• This is a descriptive essay using sense details,
  not an illustrative essay using reasons
• Show rather than tell
• Make us see, smell, taste, feel, hear it as you
  want us toto fit your Dominant Impression

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 2) SENSE DETAILS only
• Appeal to the 5 senses, not just sight
• Appeal to as many of the 5 that are relevant
• Consult your prewriting lists
• Relying solely on sight ? leads to LISTS
• Number, size, shape, texture, material,
  odor/scent, taste, sound

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 3) SIMILES METAPHORS
• use similes metaphors to reinforce your D.I.
• EX The smell is like OR The smell reminds
  me of wet, moldy leaves soaking in a crammed rain
  gutter for a month. (not a pleasing D.I.)
• rust cancer, leprosy, flesh-eating bacteria
• angry red beast headlights giant glaring
  eyes, grillhungry chrome jaws, bumperchin with
  battle scars (continue the metaphor throughout,
  only those details that support beastly)
• Warning Similes only support your sense
  details they do NOT replace the need for sense
  details.

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 4) Relate all SENSE DETAILS to your DOMINANT
  IMPRESSION
• all details should reinforce your D.I.
• if it does not, omit the detail
• all sense details and metaphors should support a
  single impression
• this is NOT a word picture in which you
  describe every aspect of your car
• instead, focus your description on your D.I.

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BODYRelate all SENSE DETAILS to your DOMINANT
IMPRESSION

• Repeat THESIS
• Another aspect of my room that makes it a pig
  sty is.
• at the start of each paragraph
• ADJECTIVES and ADVERBS that are synonymous with
  your Dominant Impression
• ADJ busy hectic, energetic, bustling, crowded,
  swarming, packed, jammed, overrun, popular,
  populous, active, lively

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 5) Use TRANSITIONS
• between sentences (logically or spatially
  connect details in each sentence) AND
• between paragraphs (repeat thesis)
• 6) Use proper PN REFERENCE
• especially when generalizing in Introduction
• Everyone has a place he/she could call his/her
  own.
• see how the use of he/she gets old fast
• so go plural Most people have a place they
  could call their own.

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 7) DICTIONuse creative, selective, and pointed
  details words (employ concrete/specific word
  choice)
• 8) Include an INTRODUCTION (see above) and a
  CONCLUSION (see below or consult the textbook)
• 9) Have a CLEAR VISION of the object (best to
  visit the place you will describe)

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 10) Have a CAREFUL SELECTION of DETAILS
• only those that support your DI
• 11) Maintain a consistent point-of-view (POV)
• no second person POV you
• your room, your car, your impression, your
  details ? your POV (speak from the I)

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BODY DOsQualities of a Strong Descriptive
Essay

• 12) COHERENCE
• develop a logical flow of ideas/details
• camera angle -- spatial organization
• 13) Paragraph Structure
• 3 Body paragraphs 3 parts of car/room
• do NOT arrange the essay around the senses (each
  paragraph is not one of the senses)
• 14) REMEMBER
• this is NOT a why or because essay which is
  supported with reasons
• instead, use aspect, feature, characteristic,
  portion

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BODYTAKE THE HINT

• SENSE DETAILS ONLY
• ONLY THOSE SENSE DETAILS THAT SUPPORT YOUR
  DOMINANT IMPRESSION
• IF ANY DETAIL DOES NOT SUPPORT YOUR DOMINANT
  IMPRESSIONNO MATTER HOW COOL OR INTERESTING IT
  MAY BEOMIT
• IT FROM THIS ESSAY

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BODY DONTs

• 1) DO NOT LIST items found in your car/room
  this does not describe lists are more exemplary
  than descriptive (this is a descriptive essay
  using sense details, not an illustrative essay
  using reasons) (show rather than tell)
• 2) Do NOT just throw ideas onto the page make
  sure you have a Dominant Impression -- a clear
  purpose, a point be a movie director and limit
  what you want the audience to see, to see it/them
  from your perspective

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BODY DONTs

• 3) Do NOT describe emotions, feelings,
  personality (these are not sense details)
• 4) Do NOT use pat expressions/clichés (rough
  around the edges), contractions (Ive, its),
  poor diction (things, a lot), or
  abbreviations (especially CDcompact disc)
• 5) NUMBERS 3 syllables/numerals 350, 1 or 2
  syllables/numerals six, twenty-five
• year 1998, 2005)

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CONCLUSION
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CONCLUSIONPURPOSE of CONCLUDING PARAGRAPHS

• To stress the importance/relevance of your
  thesis (SO WHAT?!)
• To repeat your purpose
• To repeat your thesis (moral, point, lesson,
  Dominant Impression)
• To repeat your main ideas
• To give the essay a sense of completeness/finalit
  y
• To leave the reader with a final impression
  (this is your last chance to convince/persuade
  the reader, so make the most of it!)

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CONCLUSION SUGGESTIONS

• Discuss in full the lesson learned
• Suggest larger implications of your findings
• Suggest future papers or research
• Refer back to your purpose and/or scenario
  mentioned in your Introduction
• Pose rhetorical questions
• Offer a 3rd side to the issue
• End with a CLINCHER SENTENCE

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CONCLUSIONCLINCHER SENTENCE

• Just as you ended each Body paragraph with a
  concluding sentence that wrapped up that
  point/paragraph, so too will you end the entire
  essay
• (Thesis Statement Topic Sentence Clincher
  Sentence Paragraph Clincher Sentence)
• Avoid the empty cliché
• Wrap it all up
• Relate to your point (for example, if you wrote
  a process paper on making a PBJ sandwich, end by
  saying that you are now hungry for one)

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VISUAL IMPRESSIONS
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BEDROOM 1
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BEDROOM 2
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BEDROOM 3
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CAR 1
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CAR 2
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CAR 3
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CAR 4
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Descriptive Essay VSExample Essay
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Descriptive Essay VS Example Essay

• SENSE DETAILS
• Dominant Impression
• BODY STRUCTURE
• 3 Body paragraphs
• 3 parts of the room/car
• Each supported by
• sense details ONLY
• metaphors to support DI
• LISTS prohibited
• SHOW
• SPATIAL ORDER

• REASONS
• Argument/Claim
• BODY STRUCTURE
• 3 Body paragraphs
• 3 reasons
• Each supported by
• examples
• descriptive details
• narratives
• types/roles
• LISTS permissible
• TELL
• EMPHATIC ORDER