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Developing
Resilience
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• Rural youth are
• Up to 4 times more likely to commit suicide
• Up to 5 times more likely to be involved in a
  motor vehicle accident
• Up to 4 times more likely to commit an alcohol
  related crime
• Up to 3 times more likely to die from external
  causes and injury
• Up to 7 times more likely to become pregnant
• Up to 11 times more likely to experience physical
  abuse if female (as compared to males) living in
  a rural community
• 1 in 3 rural youth aged 14-19 have been victims
  of alcohol related verbal and/or physical abuse
• More likely to use illicit substances

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• Resilience
• Rather than focusing on the shortcomings of
  young people who are at risk of academic failure,
  drug use, or other at-risk behaviors, the
  resilience idea attempts to identify factors that
  account for success
• (Gonzalez, R. Padilla, M, 1997).

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Resilient children have a positive attitude
toward their environment, hold a strong sense of
purpose, develop a strong internal strength
enabling them to see lifes obstacles as
challenges that can be overcome. Herbert 1996
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• Stanley Coopersmith observed that four basic
  components of self-esteem are
• significance/identity
• competence/achievement
• power, and
• virtue/purpose

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Generosity
Independence
Belonging
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Mastery
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Belonging Child rearing was not just the province
of biological parents, but children were nurtured
within a larger circle of significant others. Dr
Karl Menninger, observes that todays children
are desperately pursuing artificial belongings
because this need is not being fulfilled by
families, schools and neighbourhoods. Living
with and loving other human beings who return
that love is the most strengthening and
salubrious emotional experience in the world.
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• The International Youth Foundation put it this
  way
• " Every young person needs at least one adult who
  is
• irrationally committed to their well-being.
  Millions of
• children grow up virtually alone - disconnected
  from
• adults. No love. No supervision. No positive
  role
• models. Yet these people must still find their
  way
• they still grow up to become adults. Children can
  
• endure the most miserable conditions - even
  thrive
• in the midst of then when - if they have at least
  one
• loving adult committed to their success.
• New Directions p66

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Mentoring happens when adults commit themselves
to young people, not because they have to, but
because they want to. Urie Boronfenbrenner of
Cornell University describes this as having an
"irrational emotional attachment" to a young
person... It is, in Boronfenbrenner's words, "the
illusion that comes with love." New
Directions p66
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Emmy E Werner's landmark conclusions were The
strongest predictor of resilience (of children
who grow up in abusive situations and then go on
to live productive lives) was an adult mentor
outside the immediate family -- grandmother, a
minister for example -who gave them a sense of
being loved and important. Starting
Right p147
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• Research shows that young people seek help only
  from adults that they see as caring and
  nurturing.

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The systems in the human brain that allows us
to form and maintain emotional relationships
develop during infancy and the first years of
life. Experiences during this early vulnerable
period of life are critical to shaping the
capacity to form intimate and emotionally healthy
relationships. Dr. Bruce Perry
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If we wait until a young person is around 14 or
15 years of age to address the potential hazards
that face him, that is wait until he has
experimented with drugs, sex or been severely
influenced by many different media exposures we
are starting much too late.
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• Social Support
• Lack of social support is associated with
  problem behaviors (drug and alcohol use,
  delinquent acts) among youth. Strong social
  support attenuates this adverse effect.
  (McCreary, Slavine, 1996).
• Social support is often less present in the
  lives of youths at risk of school failure.
  (Rickman Rosenfled, 1998).

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Roberts et al., 1995, defined school as a
community as a place where students and teachers
care about and support each other, actively
participate in activities and decisions relating
to school, feel a sense of belonging and
identification within the school group, and have
common goals and values.
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When students had a high perception of their
school as a community, they tended to read more
outside of school, enjoy reading more, enjoy
class more, like school more, avoid work less,
and were more academically motivated. They
trusted and respected school more, enjoyed
helping others learn more, had higher educational
aspirations, and higher educational expectations.
Academically, they achieved higher on reading and
math achievement tests. In the area of personal
attitudes and behaviours, they had more concern
for others, higher self esteem, and resolved
conflicts better. It Takes a Church, p
54
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When teachers had a high perception of their
school as a community they had higher
expectations for student learning, trusted
students more, enjoyed teaching more, were more
satisfied with teaching, and had a higher overall
satisfaction with their job. When the school
climate was rated as having a high sense of
community, the principal was more competent and
supportive, parents were more supportive, and
there were more positive student-teacher
relations. It Takes a Church, p54.
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Mastery When the childs need to be competent is
satisfied, motivation for further achievement is
enhanced deprived of opportunities for success,
young people express their frustration through
troubled behaviour or by retreating in
helplessness and inferiority. A childs self
value is based upon their perception of how you
value them.
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Independence In contrast to obedience models
of discipline, Native child rearing is strongly
influenced by the principle of guidance without
interference. Elders teach values and provide
models, but the child is given increasing
opportunities to learn to make choices without
coercion.
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Well-regulated freedom was designed to give
the child abundant opportunity to learn from
experience and natural consequences In this
manner, the child who has been given
responsibility to make his own decisions in
childhood would become a responsible, disciplined
adult.
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Adolescents need oases - places where they
can go and make mistakes and be imperfect -
places where they can test themselves in the
presence of safe, caring, and accepting adults
and peers. An adolescent who is given the
zip-it silencing treatment, learns quickly not to
experiment or trust himself. Starting
Right p308
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It is clear that young people grow to maturity
by being around those people who have such
maturity themselves. Margaret Mead, the renowned
anthropologist, warned of the dangers of what
she called a co-figurative culture a culture in
which all learning is horizontal, and little or
no learning comes from an older and wiser
generation. Starting Right p144
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Anthropologist Ruth Benedict, criticised our
culture for excluding youth from responsibility
only to blame them for their irresponsibility
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Generosity Long before he could participate in
the hunt, a boy would look forward to that day
when he would bring home his first game and give
it to persons in need.
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Today, little is asked of young people except
that they be consumers. A vast industry serves
youth with schooling, entertainment and goods of
all kinds, but there are limited opportunities
for the young themselves to produce goods and
services for others. Deprived opportunities for
genuine productivity, lured into consumptive
roles, young people come to believe that their
lives make little difference to the world.
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More and more people today have the means to
live but no meaning to their existence.
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Normal Distorted Absent Attached Gang
Loyalty Unattached Loving Craves
Affection Guarded Friendly Craves
Acceptance Rejected Intimate Promiscuous Lonely Gr
egarious Clinging Aloof Cooperative Cult
Vulnerable Isolated Trusting Overly
Dependent Distrustful
Belonging
Belonging
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• Normal Distorted Absent
• Achiever Overachiever Nonachiever
• Successful Arrogant Failure Oriented
• Creative Risk-Seeker Avoid Risks
• Problem-Solver Cheater Fears Challenges
• Motivate Workaholic Unmotivated
• Persistent Delinquent Skill Gives Up Easily
• Competent Inadequate

Mastery
Mastery
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• Normal Distorted Absent
• Autonomous Dictatorial Submissive
• Confident Reckless/Macho Lacks Confidence
• Assertive Bullies Others Inferiority
• Responsible Sexual Prowess Irresponsible
• Inner Control Manipulative Helplessness
• Self-discipline Rebellious Undisciplined
• Leadership Defies Authority Easily Led

Independence
Independence
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• Normal Distorted Absent
• Altruistic Noblesse Oblige Selfishness
• Caring Plays Martyr Affectionless
• Sharing Co-Dependent Narcissistic
• Loyal Over involvement Disloyal
• Empathetic Servitude Hardened
• Pro-social Bondage Antisocial
• Supportive Exploitative

Generosity
Generosity
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Mending the Broken Circle One may need to
answer questions like these Is this revenge by a
child who feels rejection? Is this frustration in
response to failure? Is this rebellion to counter
powerlessness? Is this exploitation in pursuit of
selfish goals? One cannot mend the circle of
courage without understanding where it is broken.
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In a conversation with his aging grandfather,
Belleroe posed the question, Grandfather, what
is the purpose of life? After a long time in
thought, the old man looked up and said,
Grandson, children are the purpose of life. We
were once children and someone cared for us, and
now it is our time to care.
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We dont teach a kid how to become resilient.
We surround them with social support and a loving
and caring environment, we learn their names and
greet them personally taking a few moments to
talk one on one, and we develop enduring
relationships with them It Takes a Church,
page 4
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But suppose that they look at the model and find
a person with whom they can truly identify.
Suppose they find a warm, loving, accepting,
compassionate heart. Suppose they find high
personal standards coupled with a great
understanding of human weakness in others.
Suppose they find one who has purpose in life,
who knows where they are going, and who journeys
on their way with a song on their lips and a
radiance on their face. Will they not say, "
That's what I want let me follow you. Teach me
how to find the richness of life that you have
found.
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Do you know the names of the children who live
next door to you, who live in your street? Do you
regularly engage them in conversation? Do you do
most of the talking or most of the listening? Are
you a significant adult in the lives of the
children within your circle of social
contact? You may be the single most important
factor within a childs life that protects them
from risk.
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful,
committed citizens can change the world. Indeed,
it is the only thing that ever has. Anthr
opologist Margaret Mead
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