SOME THOUGHTS ON PASTORAL COUNSELING Part I

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SOME THOUGHTS ON PASTORAL COUNSELING (Part I)

• Chapel Counsel
• from
• Chaplain Councell
• Associate Director
• Adventist Chaplaincy Ministries

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WHOLE PERSON
Physical
Mental
Spiritual
SEXUAL
Emotional
Relational
Volitional
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MASLOWS PYRAMID OF NEEDS
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JOHARI WINDOW
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THEORIES

• Ego Analysis (Sigmund Freud)
• Growth Resources (Adler, Rank, From, Horney,
  Sullivan, Jung and Carl Rogers)
• Behavior-action Therapies
• Reality (William Glasser)
• Rational-Emotive (Albert Ellis)
• Radical stimulus-response (B. F. Skinner)
• Transactional Analysis (Eric Berne)
• Gestalt (Fredrick Perls)
• Holistic Health, Biofeedback and Body Therapies
• Family Systems Therapy (Virginia Satir)
• Feminist Therapies (Charlotte Ellen and Jean
  Miller)
• Eclectic help from combinations of approaches
• Pastoral (Christian) Counseling
• Biblical-based, conservative (Jay E. Adams
• Brief Therapy to Promote Change (AACC, Gary
  Oliver)
• Solution-focused (Charles Kollar)
• Theophostic (Gods light) Ministry freed from
  lies by truth

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COMPARISON

• CHRISTIAN
• Addresses spiritual
• Created and fallen
• Depends on the Holy Spirit and Scripture
• External reference and norm for living
• Teaches love of God, grace, forgiveness, trust
  and disciplined life (fruits of the Spirit)
• Directive

• SECULAR
• Disavows spiritual
• Evolutionary origin
• Relies on mans theories of social science
• Internal reference and norms for living
• Catharsis for healing
• Helps people adjust and cope on their own
• Non-directive

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PASTORAL COUNSELOR

• Unconditional positive regard for client
• Genuine, but responsible caring
• Respectful, never demeaning or insulting
• Attentive listener able to accurately reflect
  what is communicated
• Accepting, empathetic and understanding
• Stays neutral and does not react emotionally to
  clients emotions
• Shares truth gently, teaches rather than preaches
• Honors and upholds privileged communications /
  confidentiality

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COUNSELING STAGES

• Counseling is a process by which a person is
  assisted to behave in a more rewarding manner.
  The process is future-oriented, but happens by in
  the present by the following sequential stages
• Initial contact and contract
• Rapport-building relationship facilitation
• Plan for problem-solving (diagnosis)
• Goal identification
• Implementation of strategy
• Follow-up and evaluation
• Termination

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COUNSELING PROCESS

• Conduct the counseling in a professional setting
• Establish rapport, trust and a working contract
• Insure communications are understood
• Determine the situation and facts (you can take
  notes during the session)
• Allow the client to discover insights and come to
  conviction about their rightness
• Help the client analyze their insights and make
  personal choices in their best interest
• Assist the client to develop action steps for
  positive change
• NOTE The counseling process parallels making a
  disciple of Jesus

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TRIANGULAR TRAP!
Persecutor
?
Victim
Rescuer
H E L P! HELP! Help!
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SITUATIONAL AWARENESS

• The presenting problem is usually not the real
  issue it is a clients test balloon
• Who owns the problem?
• Watch for congruence between words, body language
  and behaviors
• Stay focused on clients issue, not your agenda
  
• Beware of the question, What do you think I
  should do?
• Whose choice is it? Are you willing to assume
  responsibility for the outcome and your client
  when you tell them what to do?

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AWARENESS WHEEL
IMPRESSION WITHOUT EXPRESSION DEPRESSION
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COMMUNICATION

• Process of transferring information
• Three basic elements
• Source (sender)
• Message
• Receiver
• Messages are influenced by
• Content
• Means of transmitting (verbal, nonverbal and
  symbolic)
• Interpretation (perceptions based on personality,
  experience, filters for encoding and decoding)
  frame of reference and motivation
• Barriers to communication
• Physical
• Psychological
• Effective communication occurs when the message
  has the same meaning for both the sender and
  receiver.

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I MESSAGES

• I messages assume responsibility for ones self
• Describe
• Specific behavior
• Tangible effect a behavior has on you
• How you feel in feeling terminology
• Examples
• I feel, because, and I want or dont want
• When that happens, it affects me and I feel
• You messages tend to blame or find fault
• NOTE Much humor is thinly veiled put-downs

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REFLECTIVE RESPONSES

• Objective Help the client understand their
  feelings and how they effect the issue
• Methods
• Questions (Can you tell me more? Why do you
  ask?)
• Paraphrasing
• Clarifying
• Trailing (restating the last word and waiting for
  client to continue)
• Reflecting (mirroring back) phrases
• You feel, because
• I sense
• What I hear you saying is
• I get the impression that you are
• Lets see if I understand what you said. Are
  you telling me?
• Im confused. Can you tell me more?
• Is that what you mean?
• When appropriate, confront using I statements
• I see you as
• From what you just said I wonder if

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PERCEPTIONS

• Objective Listen carefully to perceptions and
  help client see them from a different perspective
  
• Perceptions are interpreted ideas about ones
  self, relationships, life, the world and God
• Perceptions often are formed from early childhood
  experiences and messages that stick with us into
  adulthood can be very limiting
• Perceptions are reality to the holder
• Perceptions may not be reality, and generally are
  only partially true
• Perceptions tend to subjective views as a dark
  cloud or rosy tinted, rather than objectively

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ENERGY
CONSTRUCTIVE
Control and Confidence
Achievement and Success
INTERNALIZED
EXTERNALIZED
Homicide
Suicide
DESTRUCTIVE
ANGER
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GET HELP

• Drunk or high clients do not counsel
• Irrational anger, threatening behavior
• Talk about committing suicide
• Seizures or other manifestations of repetitious,
  disturbed mannerisms
• Seductive sexual behaviors
• Requests for money or other handouts
• Whenever you lose your objectivity and become
  emotionally involved with the clients issue or
  person
• NOTE You are not a messiah who can solve
  everyones problem

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REFERRALS

• Maintain a list of local helping agencies
• Get acquainted with helping professionals
• Obtain clients consent to make a referral
• Arrange an appointment introduce client to the
  new professional
• Share your general assessment, but no specific
  details that would violate confidentiality
• Do not leave a person threatening suicide alone
• Continue pastoral and spiritual care

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COMMENTS
?