Gabi and Debbie

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Gabi and Debbie
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• Listen to this short story maybe even a little
  funny about the day I met Gabi and Debbie with
  the magic stick.

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• I went over one evening in all innocence, looked
  around here and there, when suddenly everyone was
  talking English, and they all went black and
  white.

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• Everyone was there Miss Ding Dong Scooterman,
  and that cowboy whatsisname. There was Dr
  Hapbaker, Mister Kashtan, Yirmi Kaplan and his
  dad too.

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• And Gabi and Debbie but they were standing apart.
• Debbie seemed pissed, and Gabi troubled.

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• They said theyd lost some magic stick, and asked
  me if Id mind helping them find it? Said Cool
  there a prize for the finder?

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• They told me
• That if I find it, theyd fly to any place in the
  world I wanted.

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• Found the stick in a flash, cos Gabi had put it
  in his back pocket, the fuckwit
• Oohoo! I shouted like Homer Simpson in ecstasy

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• Lets fly to Paris Sheraton Hotel theyve got a
  Bru La Po, and a massive brothel thats where
  Id like to be.

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• Debbie cleared her throat and said, You have to
  understand. Actually wed be happy to oblige, but
  we have a few limitations.

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• First of all, this is educational TV, so the
  message has to be positive. You dont have in
  mind some place more Zionistic?

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• What Zionisty? I said what? Like Herzl?
• Oops! We landed in Basle.

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• HaDag Nachash is doing the Zionist Hip Hop
• HaDag Nachash is doing the Zionist Hip Hop

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• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni
• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni

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• Herzl is leaning on his balcony so mellow
• The moment I saw him he got my back up

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• Is he not ashamed to chill out like nothings up
  when the whole countrys going up in fire what
  is he oblivious?

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• I looked him in the eyes from close up
• What a hoot the irises dilated and the white of
  the eye pretty red!
• Psst, I whispered, looks like hes stoned

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• Gabi said
• Shut up, play it cool
• But I couldnt hold back and I went for the
  visionary of the State with no holds barred.

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• With all the details of the awful state of the
  nation
• I told him of the car accidents, I told him of
  the disableds strike
• I told him of the ¼ million unemployed
• and I told him of the corrupt politicians

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• Herzl didnt respond, just smiled broadly
• Stuck his hand deep into his pockets.

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• I tried to emphasise that theres no peace, no
  security
• That weve had enough of living in terror
• Herzl just put me a tab on my tongue and said

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• If you take it, it is no dream!

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• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni
• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni

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• I didnt manage to understand what had happened
  to me
• Suddenly I have a carbine in my hands
• Found myself in the battle for Tel Hai

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• Wow I dont want a weapon cant be bothered
  Ive got a profile of 21
• But Gabi told me that the story of Tel Hai is
  very significant, and its important to teach
  about it

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• I recognised Trumpledor immediately, what a
  weapon
• Nu, nu, the one with the arm. Or actually,
  without.

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• Hows it going Yosef? I asked politely
• But Trumpledor was edgy and angry
• Suddenly the wind blew up a dust cloud

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• Trumpledor choked and croaked and spat out some
  green stuff right next to us and afterwards
  coughed and said
• Its good to gob for your country

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• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni
• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni

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• Suddenly it all got too much for me.
• My legs gave way, I fell to the ground and
  shouted Enough!!
• This trip was supposed to have been a real treat

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• Its no fun with you guys at all
• You screwed me over, you screwed me over!

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• Debbie recovered first, and turned to me with a
  motherly look
• Youre right, she said, now well fly
• Wherever you want, wherever you say.

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• Oh, at last!
• Just not to Jerusalem 2002, I said.
• But apparently they didnt hear the not

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• Because precisely to here
• To where?
• Exactly to here
• Where?
• Precisely to here I returned.

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• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni
• HaDag Nachash oseh
• Hip hop Tzioni