Conflict Management

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Conflict Management

• Conflict Perceptions, Styles and Power

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Perceptions

• Standpoint Theory
• Originated with George Freidrich Hegel through
  observations of slaves and masters
• Each has difficulty viewing conflict situations
  from the others perspective, the others
  standpoint
• Those on the bottom of the social ladder have a
  clearer view of what is really happening because
  it is in their best interests to do so

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Standpoint

• Sandra Harding (1991) explains that people on the
  lower end of the social spectrum have more
  accurate views
• People with subordinate status have a greater
  motivation to understand powerful groups than
  vice-versa
• Economic security, survival, material comforts
  depend on understanding the powerful
• Subjugated groups have no personal investment in
  maintaining the status quo powerful groups do

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Standpoint

• Donna Haraway (1988) coined the term, situated
  knowledges to emphasize that knowledge comes from
  ones social circumstances
• Sara Ruddick (1989), for example, found that
  maternal instinct was derived from social
  groups of mothers and women who cultivate skills
  in nurturing. In other words, maternal
  instinct grows from where a person in situated
  in society

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Standpoint Theory

• Hegel used the term thrownness to suggest that
  all of us are thrown into a position in society
• That position gives us a particular vantage point
  that others within the social system do not have
• This suggests that all views are partial

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Perceiving reality is confusing

• From one vantage point the elephant looks like it
  has four legs
• From another it looks like it has five
• What vantage point is the right one?

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What do we see here?

• A blob?
• A young woman?
• An old woman?
• An old man?
• All of the above

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Making sense is difficult

• Sometimes perceiving reality around us requires
  thought and attention
• Still it is difficult to think in ways we are not
  used to thinking

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We only see the surface

• No matter how hard we try, we can not see
  everything
• There is more to the reality around us than we
  think
• Seeing things closer to the way they really are
  takes work

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Working for Understanding

• As we try to shift our perspective by standing in
  a different position
• Trying to see things from anothers point of view
• Understanding emerges

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Mindfulness

• We have implied that understanding takes work
• We have a tendency to think on autopilot
• We perform mechanically
• Being mindless is easy, and comforting we
  dont have to think

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Mindfulness

• Ellen Langer coined the term, mindfulness and
  mindlessness
• The concepts are closely aligned with Buddhist
  thinking
• Put very simply mindfulness is working to be
  aware of other perspectives through examining the
  standpoints from which other people view reality

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Thinking Mindfully in Conflicts

• In conflicts choices need to be made
• We can not respond on automatic pilot, the way we
  have always responded
• We have to think of what style of conflict
  management is right for each situation

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Conflict Styles

• People typically fall into conflict style ruts
• These are conflict styles where we feel the most
  comfortable
• We tend to use them over and over
• The rut is comfortable and it is scary to try
  something new

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Typical Conflict Styles

• Avoidance
• We ignore the conflict, sweep it under the rug
  and hope it goes away
• Least preferred style because nothing gets done
• Suppressed conflicts can emerge later and become
  detrimental to the relationship

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Avoidance

• Identifying avoidance behaviors
• People act too nice
• They attack behind the other persons back
• The use joke or sarcasm to hide the real issue
• They suggest the issue is unimportant
• The evade sensitive topics

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Competition

• Competition sets up a win/lose dichotomy
• Competitors are concerned with their own issues
  and successes
• Negative conflict spirals result from the use of
  this style

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Competitive Tactics

• Dishonesty
• Hiding your own interests
• Shifting blame and responsibility
• Hostility
• Threats and bluffs
• Personally attacking the other person

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Accommodation

• Bending over backwards to give in to the demands
  of other people
• Not doing what you believe is right
• Allowing people to walk all over you

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Accommodation Tactics

• Saying words like It doesnt really matter
• Using nonassertive gestural and other behavioral
  patterns
• Not making eye contact
• Low vocal volume
• Hesitant speech patterns, hedges and nonfluencies

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Compromise

• Compromise is a win-lose position
• Not a complete loss, but not a full-fledged win
  either
• It is somewhere in between

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Compromise Tactics

• Saying things like Lets split the difference
• Parties are getting tired of negotiation and
  compromise to make a quick resolution of the issue

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Collaboration

• Ideal cooperative strategy
• Theoretically everyone emerges from the conflict
  as a winner
• Win-win
• It takes time, creativity and effort

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Collaborative Tactics

• Honesty
• Doing complete research on issues
• Use a problem-solving stance
• Involves all parties
• Seeks creative solutions for tough problems
• Roll up shirtsleeves and work

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Collaborators

• Listen well to others, so well that they are
  articulate the other persons position accurately

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Flexibility is most important

• There are times when you may need to use any of
  all of these conflict styles
• This is where standpoint theory and mindfulness
  come in
• You try to see things from the others position
• You are mindful of the situation so you perceive
  it accurately

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When to Use Avoidance

• When the issue is trivial
• When you really dont care
• When potential violence threatens
• To let people cool down
• To gather more information

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When to Use Competition

• Against other competitors who do not respect
  other conflict styles. Once they do respect you,
  go to collaboration
• In emergencies when quick decisions are necessary

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When to Use Accommodation

• When you are wrong
• Make it right!
• When you really dont care
• When you know you will build credits for later
  issues that are more important to you

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When to Use Compromise

• When complex issues need to be resolved quickly
• As a stop-gap measure to revisit later
• To arrive at an expedient solution under time
  pressure
• When opponents of equal power are committed to
  equally exclusive goals

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When to Use Collaboration

• When all parties need to be involved to achieve
  buy-in to the final solution
• To merge insights from diverse people
• To achieve a win-win solution where everyone
  walks away feeling good about the conflict
• To achieve consensus

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In Summary

• Each of the conflict styles is useful depending
  on the situation
• Although you have a style in which you feel most
  comfortable work to obtain greater flexibility in
  how you respond to conflicts

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POWER

• Our Sources are Endless

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Power

• Is part of the relationship
• You have power if other people value what you
  have
• French and Raven isolated five sources of power

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Sources of Power

• Reward power the power to give rewards
• Coercive power the power to punish
• Legitimate power the power that derives from a
  position you hold
• Referent power power you get from who you know
• Expert power power you receive because you know
  something others dont know

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Other Research on Power Includes These Sources

• Control of tangible resources
• Money, property, land
• Authority
• Titles, ranks positions
• Expert knowledge
• Control of resources
• Making work easier, ensuring cooperation

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Power Sources

• Links to community and access to people
• Endurance, stamina, will
• Cultural traditions and history
• Communicating skills
• Traditional logic and reasoning skills
• People skills and helping people bond

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Power Sources

• Personal competence and dependability
• Self-worth, integrity and self-esteem
• An ethical sense of community and morality
• Openness to wisdom through spirituality
• Folger, Poole and Stutman, 1997

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Power

• How many of these sources of power to you
  possess?
• More than you imagine
• Using power wisely makes it easier to resolve
  conflicts