The Magnetic Manager Program presents Charm School October 7th 2003

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The Magnetic Manager ProgrampresentsCharm
SchoolOctober 7th 2003

• Kenneth P. Morse, Senior Lecturer
• and Managing Director
• MIT Entrepreneurship Center

Brought to by Sloan Leadership Forum, Sloan
Entrepreneurs, and The MIT Entrepreneurship
Center With great support from Michael Cann 04
and Todd Schwartz 04
One Amherst Street E40-196 Cambridge, MA
02142 USA phone [phone] fax
1-617-253-8633 e-mail kenmorse_at_mit.edu
http//entrepreneurship.mit.edu
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Desired Outcomes of Todays Conversation

• Learn more about whats keeping you awake at
  night.
• Enable you to be more effective
• Both getting in the door, and once inside
• In front of clientsin their organizational
  environment.
• We are here today to commit ourselves to improve
  Sloanies Reputation for Etiquette and Charm.
• Improve your chances of living a happy,
  productive life (!).
• Constructively criticize, perhaps, but still be
  seen as respecting students.

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Main Takeaways

• I think it comes down to 3 main points
• We make a commitment to improve our positive
  mental attitudes and our interpersonal skills.
• This enables us to improve Sloanies reputation
  in the business community.
• We agree to constructively criticize ourselves,
  and each other, to enable continuous improvement.

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Disclaimers References
Disclaimers

• Who checked Kens credentials?
• I only gave this lecture a few times.

References Handouts

• WSJ article
• Mary Schaefer story
• MIT Spectrum article
• Emily Post Etiquette
• Sister Mary Mercedes A Book of Courtesy
• Dale Carnegie How to Win Friends and Influence
  People
• Margaret Shepherd The Art of the Handwritten Note

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How Do You Wish To Be Known?

• Team Player
• Makes me laugh
• Realistic expectations
• Makes an effort eager beaver enthusiastic
• Understands the way the world works
• People want the best for you
• A tall man helping someone (true story)
• Charming look forward to having dinner with you
• Interesting and Sophisticated would like to
  spend a weekend in Southern France with you

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How to be Interesting on an MBA Timetable

• Cultivate multiple interests
• World Affairs (Economist, WSJ)
• Art/Music (Weekend FT or WSJ)
• Wine (Red Wine for Dummies)
• Me / Us

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Please Keep in Mind

• For example
• Clean up the
• Bathroom
• Classroom
• Cubicles
• after you use it (or even if you didnt use it)
• survey of 6 business schools

ENTITLEMENT
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Empathy
When you are out in public, keep in mind three
principles The first is to treat everyone you
meet with kindness. Your sensitivity toward
those you meet may brighten their day. The
second is to take no one for granted. Be aware
of the people around you and their rights to the
public space you share. Dont simply ignore the
waitress, the sales clerk, or the bus driver be
sincerely grateful for all services and thank
those who provide them. The third is to respect
others. Be helpful to the elderly, the infirm,
and the physically challenged. Tactfully offer
assistance when you can, open doors for them, and
always let them pass before you. When in
public, dress in a way that does not invite
stares. Avoid brushing your hair or applying
makeup in public. Sister Mary Mercedes, O.P.
The greater the, man the greater courtesy. -
Alfred, Lord Tennyson (1809-1892)
Your conduct in public should be marked by quiet
dignity. The keynote of good manners is
unobtrusiveness. Sister Mary Mercedes
Above all, respect the time and privacy of
others. Sister Mary Mercedes
No man is an island, No man stands alone, Each
mans grief is grief to me, Each mans joy is my
own. - John Dunn
Conversationis the art of never appearing a
bore, of knowing how to say everything
interestingly, to entertain with no matter what,
to be charming with nothing at all. Guy de
Maupassant (1850-1893)
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Realities (1)

• Be humble, grateful, approachable, low
  maintenance.
• Every successful executive asks his/her secretary
  or junior colleague, do I really need to return
  this guys phone call?
• For your first year or two after graduation, you
  will probably know less than almost anyone
  where you work.
• For sure, today, you know less about the company
  than any employee who might be recruiting you.
• Everybody is busy dont ask people to think for
  you. For example, if you want someone to write a
  letter of reference for you, provide a first
  draft for them, with inside address and email.
• Likewise, if you want people to want to work with
  you, make extra efforts so they dont have to.

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Realities (2)

• Focus on what your host wants from the event, and
  then think about what you want out of the event
• first job, option plan
• Preparing for the job interview
• The C word

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Cocktail Party Management

• Timing
• Mission
• Positioning
• Teamwork
• Paperwork

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The Game Plan
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Timing

• Arrive Early
• Check the Name Tags
• Be Charming to Your Hosts
• Locate the Best Food
• Write Thank-you Letters within 3-4 Hours

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Mission

• Desired impressions
• People to meet
• Deliver value to all you meet, with grace
  and charm
• Be recognized as a Network Resource
• Carrying water power

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Positioning

• Lighting
• Bar
• Food
• Doors
• Teamwork

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Teamwork

• Know your capabilities
• Team
• Others
• Work the room together

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Paperwork

• Prepare
• Study attendee list
• Distribute hardcopies at the start of your talk
• Controls the message
• Facilitates note taking in your favor
• Improves internal communication and filing

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How to be Successful

• Say you, not I
• Ask questions avoid statements
• Seek to understand needs
• Look at the world in their terms
• Dale Carnegie is still the best

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Dos and Donts

• Looks DO Matter ironed shirt, cleanly pressed
  suit, hair shampooed, well-scrubbed, earnest,
  sincere, tight tie.
• Say nice, thoughtful things about other people
  the story of two generals, five MBAs, our
  volunteer professors.
• What is the best way to have someone like you and
  remember you?
• Preparing for an event
• Donts
• Prepare the 5 things youre gonna tell them (i.e.
  make them listen to) in the first 50 seconds.
• Hi, howre ya doin?
• Send a nice thank you note before the sun comes
  up.

• Who is the host?
• What is on their mind?
• Ask thoughtful, caring questions.
• Think of some nice things to say

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Delivering Your Elevator Pitch Effectively

• Convinces the target person to schedule a
  longer meeting with you, and to be receptive to
  doing business with you.
• Empowers and enables the target person also to
  convince other appropriate people to become
  interested in your company.
• Demonstrates sincerity.
• Communicates a sense of value, empathy, and
  urgency.
• Combines thorough Sales and Market Research.
• Requires no more than 1-2 minutes.

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Writing a Successful Thank-You Letter
Jacqueline Wadsworth Tang One Amherst
Lane Sloaneville, MA 02345-7890 Phone
1-617-253-1611 Mobile [phone]
February 2001   Mr./Dr./Ms. Michael L.
Merrill Founder Honorary Chairman Thundering
Herd Investments, LLC. One Liberty Plaza, Suite
4500 New York, N.Y. 10022   Dear Dr.
Merrill   You were very kind to meet with our
MIT Sloan team today to help us explore how we
might be able to make a significant contribution
to your exciting mission. As we
discussed, Sincerely yours, _________________
______ Jacqueline Wadsworth Tang
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Correspondence Etiquette (1)
To "'kenmorse_at_mit.edu'" Subjec
t Visit to MIT Date Wed, 5 Dec 2001 141140
-0600   Dear Prof. Morse   I intend to apply to
the MIT Sloan School of Business for the Fall
2002 program. I am visiting Boston for work
reasons on Dec 19. I intend to visit the MIT
Business School.   Two or three years after
graduation from my MBA, I intend to start my own
business. After visiting your website, I am
interested in the activities of the
Entrepreneur's Club and Venture Capital
Forum.   I was wondering whether I could meet you
to discuss the opportunities at MIT for future
entrepreneurs. I have a lot of ideas, and I am
hoping to be able to analyse them during my
business school tenure. It might involve taking
over a sick company or teaming with others to
develop an IT business with new products or to
enter new markets. My expertise is in Marketing,
Sales and General Management.   I would
appreciate your help.   Thank you.   Sincerely,
 To "'Ken Morse'" Subject
RE Visit to MIT Date Fri, 7 Dec 2001 162846
-0600   Dear Prof. Morse   Thank you very much
for offering to meet me. I will refer to the
website before I come to Boston.   Please do
share my email with your colleagues. I am
enclosing a copy of my Resume in Microsoft
Word.   I look forward to meeting you on December
19.    Regards,
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Correspondence Etiquette (2)
Ken,    Prof. ______ suggested I get in touch
with you. I am a Sloan Alum ('95), and was until
recently CEO of a venture-backed company . which
was sold last year.   As I'm sure you're only too
aware, there's a sad mismatch these days between
supply and demand for start up general managers.
I have a number of classmates (some of whom also
jumped ship from successful consulting careers)
and who are now having a rather difficult time
"falling forward," to use the MIT expression. It
would be terrific if there were something more
systematic that Sloan could do to help those of
us in this kind of situation. What's needed, I
think, is something beyond the existing forward
placement services, which were not really
intended to help people with successful resume
and job market skills, but who are facing an
unprecedentedly poor market. Having some time on
my hands, I'd be willing to put some effort into
thinking about what might be done, even looking
at what some other peer B schools are doing.
For example, many people I know are seeking
freelance consulting opportunities, and perhaps
the MIT Entrepreneurship Center could facilitate.
At any rate, as your semester ends, I am
wondering if we could find some time to meet to
discuss this.   Thanks
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Case Example 1

• April 1 Biotech Celebration Cambridge, UK
• Speech looking for internships
• A few companies express interest
• Next Day Reach out to BioPharma Club officers
• Please say who rocks
• Newport Gala seek candidates
• Mid-April Interview candidates at E-Center
• End-April Submit. Call. Discuss. Match. Select.
• Mid-June Start find partnering opportunities
• Late-August End return to MIT
• Mid-September meet at 50K event

Your network and peer relationships count a lot
Thank you note?
Thank you note? Be nice to others?
Message to base Hi, Im installedproject is
excitingthey are so nicewill you be here?
Message Im back. Thanks. Heres what I did.
Chocolates or flowers for Audrey and Pat.
Quick interrupt, hover, connect.
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Case Example 2

• Recent Alum (5 years ago) committed to making
  Sloan a classier place
• Launched the Newport Galas
• Planted the seeds for Charm School
• Moved to London
• Launched MIT Young Alumni Club
• Helped with CMI
• Moved back perfect networking skills. New
  biotech exec.
• Biotech Celebration we introduced her to CEO
  watershed meeting
• E-Society event host giving back

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Presentation / Classroom Etiquette

• Clean-up after yourselves and your classmates
  before leaving the room (empty drink containers,
  trash, etc.)
• Respectfully keep notebook PCs closed during
  lunchtime presentations. Ask anyone in your
  vicinity who is using one to discontinue.
  Emailing or surfing the web during presentations
  is unacceptable behavior for at least two
  reasons
• Collective enforcement Help other students
  adhere to etiquette. Ask others to close their
  laptops or pick up trash. Support those who make
  the same request of others.
• Cell phones!

• It is disruptive to other students listening to
  the presentation.
• It is rude to the professionals who are giving
  the presentation.

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Next Meetings

• What every good secretary knows and most
  Sloanies dont about writing a letter.
• Margaret Shepard The Art of the Handwritten Note

IAP Activities

• All Grapes Would Be Port If They Could Be
• The Theory and Practice of Good Cheese
• Italy and France
• Communication Do You Hear What I Hear?
• Interviewing Skills
• Art Architecture Tour of the Boston Public
  Library
• Read Dale Carnegies book
• Valentines Day

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