CURRENT STATE OF DATING

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CURRENT STATE OF DATING
To students, reality is not as important as
perception of reality. Everyone is doing it
become a justification - both to students and
parents - even if what theyre doing is wrong.
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ARGUMENTS FOR DATING

• THE LEARNING TO INTERACT WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX
  ARGUMENT
• This helps to get to know the opposite sex better
  - to see how they think/act
• ??? - Cant most of that be learned through mixed
  group activities?

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ARGUMENTS FOR DATING

• THE I NEED TO KNOW WHAT I LIKE ARGUMENT
• This helps me to know what characteristics and
  qualities Im really drawn to - and what
  irritates me
• ??? - Must you have pain to know joy? What about
  Gods input?

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ARGUMENTS FOR DATING

• THE SOWING WILD OATS ARGUMENT
• You need to get your wild desires out of the way
  before you get married.
• ??? - Does doing this before marriage limit it
  afterwards? Isnt most of this wrong while
  dating?

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ARGUMENTS FOR DATING

• THE EVERYONE IS DOING IT ARGUMENT
• Dating is universal among teens - and how we find
  our mates now. Not doing it is harmful.
• ??? - While some merit to this, does it become
  right because it is so common?

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE WOUNDING ARGUMENT
• All dating relationships end one of two ways -
  marriage or break up
• The inevitable break ups wound both parties
• This feeds pre-existing fears and sensitivies
• It also leads to unloving acts

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE WALL ARGUMENT
• Each of these painful break ups lead you to
  become more guarded and to build walls between
  you others
• The next person has to deal with the previous
  ones mistakes
• Each new relationship starts with a handicap

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE WALL ARGUMENT

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE SEXUAL ARGUMENT
• Couples rely on the physical element of the
  relationship, putting strain on the other
  elements which are slower
• Physical quickly smothers emotional, relational,
  and especially spiritual elements
• The relationship is doomed

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE SEXUAL ARGUMENT
• top is ideal, bottom is sexual

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE DIVORCE ARGUMENT
• People say dating teaches you how to be married,
  but it actually teaches divorce
• Get out when the going gets rough
• Split up property and friends
• Get bitter and unforgiving
• Look for something better

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ARGUMENTS AGAINST DATING

• THE TRUST GOD ARGUMENT
• We dont want to trust God with our lives.
• It isnt easy to hand our responsibility to
  someone else - especially when it comes to our
  happiness
• God knows us better and wants the best for us -
  and KNOWS the best for us.

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• OBEY AND HONOR YOUR PARENTS
• If they say you cant date until a certain age,
  obey.
• If they set a curfew, or rules for dating -
  follow them
• Why would you want someone who encourages you to
  disobey your parents?

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• HAVE ACCOUNTABILITY
• Have friends who will make sure you are not
  getting into compromising situations
• They must be trustworthy
• Have them ask you the hard questions about your
  relationships - sex, abuse, lust, physical
  element

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• BE RESPECTFUL
• Guys, treat your dates like ladies - remembering
  they are loved by God and in His image.
• Girls, recognize it is going to be more difficult
  for you date, so be careful in your dress, words,
  actions
• No serial dating, bad breaks

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• BE PURE
• Do not allow for even a hint of immorality in
  your dating relationship
• Commit to wait until marriage
• Do not even look on the nakedness of another

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• DONT SETTLE
• No matter how long it takes, never lower your
  standards.
• Do not get involved with a non-Christian.
• Girls, wait for a guy who can be a gentle leader.
• Guys, wait for a girl who will make you better.

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• PRAY ABOUT IT
• We are supposed to pray about everything, but
  this is one issue many wont pray about.
• Ask God for wisdom and for guidance - and to
  protect you from your own desires and the desires
  of others.

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BIBLICAL STANDARDS FOR DATING

• TRUST GOD
• He made you, and He loves you more than anyone
  else anywhere ever will
• He wants the best for you
• Trust Him that He knows the who, when, how, and
  where and allow Him to guide you.