Developing Effective Leaders

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Developing Effective Leaders

• Managing Challenging Situations and People

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Yelling to handle challenging situations and
people
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Using resources and data to make a point
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When followers just dont want to go along with
the leader
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Using physical force or threats to persuade
others
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Objectives

• Recognize the personal and professional benefits
  of successfully working with challenging people
  and situations.
• Understand your own approaches to managing
  conflict.
• Identify the characteristics of challenging
  people and situations.
• Manage interpersonal differences.
• Manage false agreement when setting personal and
  organizational goals.

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Conflict as Opportunity

• An opportunity for
• personal organization change
• learning
• growth
• improved performance
• Points out existing barriers to success.

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Do you understand your own beliefs, attitudes,
and values?

• People react differently to the same challenging
  situations.
• Understanding your tolerance and acceptance level
  is key to managing challenging situations and
  people effectively.
• Activity The Gold Watch

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Managing Conflict Creatively

• What is your conflict management style?
• Aggressive/Confrontive
• Assertive/Persuasive
• Observant/Introspective
• Avoidant/Reactive
• Activity Your Conflict Management Style

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Conflict Resolution Teams

• The secret of managing is to keep the guys who
  hate you away from the guys who are undecided.
  Casey Stengel

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Categories of Challenging People

• Complainers
• Super-Agreeables
• Negativists
• Silent-Unresponsives
• Indecisives
• Hostile-Aggressives
• Know-It-All Experts

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Complainers
Twenty percent of the people will be against
anything. Robert Kennedy U.S. Attorney
General
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Super-Agreeables
Theres nothing Im afraid of like scared
people. Robert Frost
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Negativists
It takes a clever man to turn a cynic and a wise
man to be clever enough not to. Fannie
Hurst
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Silent-Unresponsives
Silence is the best tactic for him who distrusts
himself. Francois, Duc de La Rochefoucauld 161
3-1680
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Indecisives
There is no more miserable human being than one
in whom nothing is habitual but indecision.
William James 1842-1910
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Hostile-Aggressives
Anybody can become angry - that is easybut to
be angry with the right
person, to the right
degree, at the right
time, for the right
purpose, and in
the right way -that is not within everybodys
power and is not easy. Aristotle
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Know-It-All Experts
They spend their time mostly looking forward
tothe past. John Osborne in Look Back in
Anger
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10 General Strategies

• Put problem people in proper perspective.
• Take your pick -- positive or negative.
• Dont expect difficult people to change.
• Learn to respond as well as listen.
• Give and request frequent feedback.
• Look first at policies and procedures.
• Deal directly and discreetly.
• Document for self-protection.
• Be straightforward and unemotional.
• Be gracious.

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Communicating One-on-One

• Spend time on rapport.
• Minimize interruptions.
• Watch out for psychological barriers.
• Be aware of your posture.
• Use intensity to your advantage.
• Go to the other persons turf.

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Listening

• As important as talking
• Pay respectful attention.
• Let the speaker know how you interpret his/her
  message through
• interested silence
• body language
• verbal responses

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I and You Messages

• You messages are
• Directed at the other person.
• Highly likely to put the recipient down.
• Going to make the recipient feel
• guilty
• like their needs are unimportant
• resistant to change
• You messages remove the responsibility for
  behavior change from the other person.

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I Messages

• Parts of an I message
• Specific behavior or situation
• Your resulting feeling
• Tangible effect on you

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False Agreement

• On the Road to Abilene
• The Abilene Paradox
• Moral of the story
• There is a difference between real and phony
  conflict.
• False agreement is as damaging as disagreement.
• Skills in agreement management include Owning
  up and Risk taking.

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Case Studies and Activities
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Closing Thoughts

• You can control yourself.
• You can manage the situation.
• However, you cannot control another person.