The 2012 Brownlow

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The 2012 Brownlow

• Jo Bailey Award

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• Welcome to my take on the WAGs and outfits at
  this years 2012 Brownlow Medal

The award is named in honour of Jo Bailey, wife
of Fullback of the Century and Carlton legend,
Stephen Silvagni, for her display of excellence,
beauty and style over many years.
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Callan Ward enjoying the wads of cash at GWS with
you have to love it when its just listed as
partner! Heres a tip darling get a better
publicist or a better date!
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One of the favourites Trent Cotchin and Brooke
Kennedy. Am a bit unsure on the outfit. Torn
between red carpet glamour and nanas
loungreroom curtains.
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Paddy Dangerfield and the lovely Mardi Harwood.
Maybe he wont be coming back to Victoria having
found one of the few attractive SA ladies
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Ryan Griffen and the very bright Jasmin Putra.
Still unsure on this outfit, but she certainly
fills it well
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The Coleman medalist and All Australian Full
forward . . . What? Seriously? You mean, he
wasnt in the AA?? FFS! Ok, the Coleman medalist
with Carly Ziegler
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Jack Grimes with a very rare Melbourne win
the lovely Jade Tyrell
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Kade Simpson with a very hot looking and often
repeated name of the night partner
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Inaugural winner of the Jim Stynes award, Jackson
and Jenny Moodie.
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Jay Schulz and his stunning wife Amy
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Juddy and Rebecca. Am a big fan of twiggers
work, but she seems to be wasting away. She
needs to drop the Tania Hird diet.
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Once again proving how attractive women are never
shallow and are always attracted to a mans
personality. . . Ivan Maric and the Erin Howard
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Chris Newmans wife Lauren
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Mitch Clark towering over his date Samantha Blades
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NicNat and Elli Demasi. Of course, if this award
was being done by the AA panel, hed have won
already. I mean its not like he was outperformed
in all areas by say, the less than fashionable
Sam Jacobs
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Not often does a coach make our list but an
exception WILL be made for Brenton Sanderson and
the lovely Veronika Temmerova
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Steele Sidebottom and the beautiful Lauren
Longstaff.
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Dane Swan and the surprisingly free from ink,
Taylor Wilson. When asked about anything, Dane
responded, Yeahhhhh, naahhhhhh, maaaaaate. No
doubt a spot on Ch 7 commentary team awaits!
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Brownlow favourite Scott Thompson pretty chuffed
not to be out with a Salisbury scrubber. Here
with the actress Jessica McNamee looking very
glamourous although, is that a sports bra???
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The North Scott Thompson with Lauren Gear. Just
how many bloody Laurens are there ???
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The resilient Shane Tuck, punching above his
weight as always with his gorgeous wife Katherine.
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The What the ?

• Before we get into the judging, lets change the
  pace a bit and highlight some of the poorer
  efforts.

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Nice of Leroy to do go to his dates Deb Ball just
before the Brownlow.
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Normally we have a lot of time for Denise
Bartlett. But really, whats with the shoes.
Its not shopping at Coles!
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Milney and his wife Melissa. Come on Stephen,
shes easily over 21. You are fooling no one.
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Heath Scotlands wife Alisha is one of our
favourites. But this year, it was a massive miss
for this. Somewhere, an entire forest of tulle
has died for this!
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A rare feat for someone so young 2 years
running in the WTF category! Maybe its just the
hair, or the fact he picks dates that have Milney
salivating. Dyson lift! You have an Essendon
table to compete with.
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At least shes looking less terrified than she
was in front of the cameras.
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Previous winner Gavin Wanganeen and his wife
Phillipa, modelling for the next range of toilet
roll holders we think.
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What should have been a triumph for Ryan
OKeefes wife Tara was instead a disaster.
Everything is perfect, EXCEPT for the modesty
panel at the front. Youre not 75 honey. Either
get some Hollywood tape or try another dress.
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Ok, I know hes the player of the century, but
does his wife really need a matching halo????
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Tom Rockliff and Jenna Cumming. Everything was
going swell. Lovely designer dress, hot AFL
player, invite to the Brownlow. All until whoosh,
you revealed youd worn your favourite sandals
! Hey I know they are supposed to match the
lovely blue through the dress, but sorry, FAIL!
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Its so bad its actually funny. Thanks Kevin
Murray.
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Some Boom tish moments

• In honour of Kelvin Cunnington.

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Kerry DOES love big Cox! Haaaaa Haaaaa !
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Cougar alert! Rooooaaaaarrrrrr
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Its rumored, that this guy, is from the
country Who would have known?
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David Swallow with his wife Elise. Haaaaa
Haaaaa Swallow? Get it ??? Get it ??? Haaaaaa
Haaaaaa
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• Some Musings. . . .
• Typically, Channel 7 still struggle on presenting
  the ladies for our, errr consumption. However,
  for them, I will repeat my free advice.
• greet the couples
• ask her where she got her dress
• Make her twirl so we can assess TA
• next.
• 5 minute segments on Josh Gibson are so . . .
  Well, Im BORED now. Muskets at dawn!

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The Rising Star award
Awarded to what we believe are good first up
efforts at the Brownlow. Apologies if they have
been there before, but hey, its the first time
weve noticed them!
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Rising Star
Adam Treloar and the lovely in lemon, Kelsey
Tomkins Right Jeremey Cameron and Katie Parker

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Rising Star
Jonathon Giles and what we always love from our
Rising Stars. An unnamed Partner!
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Rising Star
Ok, the Hawk has big hands, but Im sure they
look big even in his! Tom Hawkins and Emma
Clapham
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Rising Star -Winner
Chris Mayne made every post a winner with the
sensational Kathleen Furey. Bet she looks a
picture on the beach at Cottesloe!
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And to our finalists
Big improvement this year with some very lovely
ladies in wonderful outfits that displayed all of
their . . .. personality! As always, we had a
few regulars, but also a good number of first up
entrants
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Pia Miller on the red carpet. Memo AFL we
are a bit disappointed that a certain S Hampson
of Carlton wasnt invited.
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Dayne Beams and Kelly Meehan.
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The winner whos date Ella Keddie was looking
especially hot
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Paul Chapman and Lauren Smith
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Fifth place
Josh Kennedy with the women in red, Ana Calle who
did a superb job as a total stranger to the
Brownlow. And when she spoke, well that was the
icing on the cake!
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Fourth Place
Nick Dal Santo has been putting in some solid
work recently and unlike his colleagues down at
Moorabin, he doesnt need Rhohipnol. Here he is
with the lovely Judie Klein
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Third Place
Pendles and the always beautiful, Alex Davis.
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Second place
Rory Sloane threatened the top 5 last year and
has burst in with the very beautiful Belinde
Riverso, looking absolutely stunning.
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And the winner of the 2012 Jo Bailey Award goes
to . . . .
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2012 Jo Bailey
Marc Murphy has been chipping away at Juddy and
with this victory, he surely should be given the
captaincy. Here he is with the stunning Jessie
Haberman.
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And we leave you with this years Phark Off award.
Three winners this year
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Am I in the twilight zone? Im now repeating
myself! This is exactly what I wrote in 2011
and it applies even more so. Phark Off One The
self aggrandizing attention seeking wannabe.
To all channels and the AFL, stop feeding the
animal! As for you Channel 7. A reality TV show
on her? You must be so proud. Phark Off Two
Ch 7 Commentators Ohhhh for a Kerry Packer who
would just drag them all in and say Commetti,
get back to what you do best. Bruce, shut the
fuck up and retire. Youre boring. Tom Harley
you too can fuck off. Darcy. You fucking
imbecile. I dont care what your pet theory is.
Keep it to yourself and commentate somewhere
else. Kirk? Wheres the fucking Dalai Lama?
Kirk, piss off, your fired. Bet you didnt read
that in your fucking tea leaves! And another
thing. If I want to hear current day players
talk, Ill go to a fucking press conference. So
sack them all. And lastly, if you even think of
Dermie or BT, sack your fucking self!
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Phark Off Three a perennial award Andrew
Jabba Demetriou. Heres a tip STFU! Pausing
on Jayyyyyyyyy when reading Essendon votes
shows stupid you are. Guess what? There are
only 2 other players at Essendon with a name
starting with J. Jake Melksham and Jake
Carlisle. And if you thought that either of
those blokes were going to get votes, you know
less about football than we dared to fear. That
you get paid more than any of the footballers is
the ultimate disgrace. That you think you are
worth it is even worse. Fuck off you useless
fuck!