Men One Liners

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Men One Liners
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• How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the
  world does it take to do the dishes?
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• How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the
  world does it take to do the dishes?
• Answer Both of them.
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• Why dont women blink
• during sex?
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• Why dont women blink
• during sex?
• Answer They dont have time.
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• Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one
  egg?

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• Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one
  egg?
• Answer They dont stop and ask for directions.
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•  What do men and sperm have in common?
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•  What do men and sperm have in common?
• Answer They both have a oneinamillion chance
  of becoming a human being.
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•  How does a man show that he is planning for the
  future?
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•  How does a man show that he is planning for the
  future?
• Answer He buys two cases of beer.
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• What is the difference between men and government
  bonds?
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• What is the difference between men and government
  bonds?
• Answer The bonds mature.
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• Why are blonde jokes so short?

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• Why are blonde jokes so short?
• Answer So men can remember them.
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•  How many men does it take to change a roll of
  toilet paper?

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•  How many men does it take to change a roll of
  toilet paper?
• Answer We dont know it has never happened.
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•  What do you call a woman who knows where her
  husband is every night?
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•  What do you call a woman who knows where her
  husband is every night?
• Answer A widow.
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• When do women care for a mans company?
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• When do women care for a mans company?
• Answer When he owns it.
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• Why are married women heavier than single women?
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• Why are married women heavier than single women?
• Answer Single women come home, see whats in the
  fridge and go to bed.
• Married women come home, see whats in bed and go
  to the fridge.

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•  How do you get a man to do
• sit-ups?
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• How do you get a man to do
• sit-ups?
• Answer Put the remote control between his toes.

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•  What did God say after creating man?

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•  What did God say after creating man?
• Answer I must be able to do better than that.

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•  What is the one thing that all men at singles
  bars have in common?
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•  What is the one thing that all men at singles
  bars have in common?
• Answer Theyre married.

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• Man says to God
• God, why did you make woman so beautiful?
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• Man says to God
• God, why did you make woman so beautiful?
• God saysSo you would love her.
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• Man says to God
• God, why did you make woman so beautiful?
• God saysSo you would love her.
• But God, the man says,
• why didnt you make her more intelligent?
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• Man says to God
• God, why did you make woman so beautiful?
• God saysSo you would love her.
• But God, the man says,
• why didnt you make her more intelligent?
• God says So she would love you.