ONLY CHILD

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ONLY CHILD

• ELHAM SHIRAZI MDCHILD ADOLESCENT
• PSYCHIATRIST
• UNIVERSITY of MEDICAL SCIENCE

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ONLY CHIILD

• Recent Years
• contraceptives entry of
  women in work
• divorce
  economic limitations
• fertility rate
  only child worldwide
• 
  ( Westoff,1978)
• Special Types of Experiences
• Lack interaction competition with
  siblings
• More interaction with parents
• 
  
  
  
  

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3

• Early writings focused on traits
  
• Empirical Studies in last Decades
• No worse off than sibling counterparts
• Very similar to 1st child
• All 1st child are only child for some
  period
• In many ways compare more favorable
• (Hoopes Harper ,1987 Pilot Falbo,1987 Tao
  KT,1998)

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4
Stages of Development

• Infancy Toddlerhood
• School Age
• Adolescence
• Adulthood

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5
Infancy Toddlerhood

• Mothers
• Touch
• Bath
• Rock
• Kiss only child gt1st
  born
• Play (Feiring
  Lewis,1984)
• Look at
• Vocalize
• Approve

4
6
School Age

• Similar to others in academic performance
  (Meller,1990)
• More time spend with parent
• better understands expectations of
  adults
• More information exchange in all SES cultures
• larger more fluent vocabulary
  (Feiring,1984)
• High verbal skills
• Adultlike behavior
• success in school
• 
  (Pilot Falbo,1987Falbo,1993)

5
7

• No sibling to practice
• Low proficiency in physical activity
• Sport plays large part of socialization in
  middle school boys
• low proficiency in
  sport
• being popular
  solitary activities
• 
  
• (Veenhoven
  Verkuyten,1989)

6
8
Adolescent Adulthood

• More mature
• More socially sensitive
• Have social skills , but didnt seek social lives
• Higher initiation industriousness in education
  occupation
• 
  
  (Claudy,1984)
• More interested in white-collar,analytic,scientifi
  c,productive occupations activities
  (Pilot,1980 Nuttal Nuttal,1980)
• Marry better educated partners
• Marriage stability sibling
  counterparts
• Less prone to divorce
• (Groat,Wicks Neal,1984
  Veenhoven Verkuyten,1989)
• 
  
  
  

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9
Family Issues

• Is center stage in family
• Parents invest more time,energy,approval in
• only child carry all hopes fears
  of parents and
• other generation
• Quickly learn
• When achieve receive affirmation
• Security depends on being on target with
  others
• expectations (especially parents)
• Try To
• Please parents
• Produce outcomes to meet familys approval
  

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10

• Many parents smoother them with
• physical affection high expectations
• Too harsh parental demands fail,give
  up,rebel
• 
  (Harper Hooper,1997)
• Less parental permissiveness interfere
  with
• maturation separation-individuation
  less autonomous
• 
  (Byrd,1993Watson,1989)
• Poorly defined ego boundaries for parent child
• Feel responsible to compensate for
  parental
• failure,unmet emotional
  needs,unfulfilled wishes
• MAY ACT THEM OUT!
• (
  Harper Hoopes,1997)

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11

• Best predictor of adjustment of only child
• adjustment of parents!
• 
  (Feiring Lewis,1984)
• Only child in one family will not behave
  identical to only child in another family.
• 
  (Rosenberg Hyde,1993)
• 
  

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12
Interpersonal Relationship

• Continual help nurturing from parents
  
• expect others as helpful
  rewarding
• More trusting style !
  
• 
  (Falbo,1984)
• Have more mature cultured soial skills
• More successful soially
  !
• Rated by others as sociable
• Feel responsible to respond to others
  expectations

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13

• Some performance anxiety in social situations
• Want to know do people still pick them up
• if they show weakness vulnerability ?
• 
  
• 
  (Lackie,1984)

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14

• Cautious in forming relationship
• Make close friendship
• Spend less time with friends
• Spend more time in solitary activities
• Dont rate themselves lonelier
• 
  (Falbo Pilot,1986)

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Perceptual Cognitive Orientation

• Rational analytical !
• Focus on details of events experiences
• Go from parts to whole (inductive reasoning )
• Focus on explicit behaviors,facts,emotions
• Focus on literal meaning of language
• They must know everything !
• Gather more data than necessary may be
  confused !
• Sometimes restrict perceptual field dont
  consider
• additional information want maintain
  their explanation
• (Falbo,1984Hooper
  Harper,1987Wang,1998)
• 
  

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Affective Pattern

• Approach feeling through rational cognition
• Think about feelings to realize their existence
• Express emotions if linked to outcome they focus
• Deny emotions if make them seem weak
• 
  (Harper
  Hooper,1987)
• 
  
• 
  
  
  

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Self-Esteem

• Similar to other in self-esteem well-being
• But
• gaining self-esteem is different !
• Based on doing well in the eyes of others !
• Need to be On target
  
  
• Feel productive
  successful
• Be recognized as
  central
• (Harper Hoopes,1987 Veenhoven
  Verkuyten,1989)

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18
Mental Health

• Least referred for mental health services
  (Mower,1987)
• Least prone to abuse
• Some evidence
• more prone toSubstance abuse
  (Stein,1988)
• 
  Psychosomatic illnesses (Sheldrake,1976)
• Type A
  behavior
• Stress
  related illnesses (Ivancevich,1987)
• 
  
• 
  

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Threatened Psychologically????

• Cant obtain enough information
• Overwhelmed by too many details
• Feeling inadequate
• Being off target in eyes of others
• Many people need assistance much
  disorganization

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Working with Symptomatic Only Child

• Single or traditional family ?
• Interactions,emotional expression of family ?
• Boundaries,intimacy,dependency of family ?
• Expectations,values,roles,rules of family ?
• Are they realistic ?
• Whether parents agree on them ?

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21

• Whether child is like/ opposite his parent ?
• Relationship with each parent ?
• Ways parents respond to performance ?
• Whether parents help legitimize emotions ?
• Adjustment of parents ?
• Adjustment of child ?
• 
  (Harper Hooper,1997)

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Guidelines for Only Child

• Help establish clear ego boundaries individuate
  
• Validate only child right to be who they are
• Release only child from overly responsible for
  others
• Make him free from fulfilling parental
  expectations wishes
• If family is dysfunctional convince the
  child he isnt responsible
• Issues of launching
• 
  (Harper Hooper,1997)

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Guidelines for Parents

• Increase approval for their child as people
• not just for what they do !
• Make rules,values,expectations explicit
• Make expectations realistic reachable
• Reassure they are on target have your approval

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• Let only child know when they have done enough
• limit his tendency to be obsessive
• Legitimize only childs emotions
• Provide more information for them
• Accept their rules
• Explore weakness failures without discounting
  them
• 
  (Harper Hooper,1997)

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