Concrete Detail

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• Concrete Detail

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SIGNIFICANT

• Concrete Detail

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Isnt any detail a good thing, as long as its
concrete?

• The young woman was tall, with a figure of
  perfect elegance on a large scale. She had dark
  and abundant hair, so glossy that it threw off
  the sunshine with a gleam and a face which,
  besides being beautiful from regularity of
  feature and richness of complexion, had the
  impressiveness belonging to a marked brow and
  deep black eyes. She was ladylike, too, after the
  manner of the feminine gentility of those days
  characterised by a certain state and dignity,
  rather than by the delicate, evanescent, and
  indescribable grace which is now recognised as
  its indication.

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Pretty long description

• And never had Hester Prynne appeared more
  ladylike, in the antique interpretation of the
  term, than as she issued from the prison.

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• The leaves were bright green, and the sun
  filtered through them onto the forest floor. I
  heard a brook gurgling somewhere in the distance.
  A chirp came from above me. I looked up to see
  a sparrow sitting on a branch. It seemed to be
  looking at me and cocked its head to the side.

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• The leaves were bright green, and the sun
  filtered through them onto the forest floor. I
  heard a brook gurgling somewhere in the distance.
  A chirp came from above me. I looked up to see
  a sparrow sitting on a branch. It seemed to be
  looking at me and cocked its head to the side.
  Even nature was mocking me for the terrible act I
  had committed.

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• The man was wearing a big coat.

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• The man was wearing a big coat, and he glanced
  around every time somebody else walked into the
  electronics aisle.

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• John was about six feet tall with broad
  shoulders.

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• John was about six feet tall with broad
  shoulders. The man approaching him, however,
  was taller and broader.

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• She had blue eyes and blonde hair.

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• She had blue eyes and blonde hair. The picture
  on the ID she handed the bouncer had blue eyes
  and brown hair.

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• He ordered a grilled cheese and tomato soup,
  his favorite lunch.

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• He ordered a grilled cheese and tomato soup,
  his favorite lunch. When the bell rang at the
  end of the period, his bowl was still full, and
  his sandwich was only missing two bites.

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• To practice, write down sentences that
  describe someone or something using concrete
  detail. Stop before you get to the significant
  ones.
• Put your paper on the cart when youre done,
  and pick up someone elses.
• Add details to each sentence to make the
  description significant.