Pilot Gripe Sheets

1
Pilot Gripe Sheets

• After every flight, pilots fill out a form called
  a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics
  problems encountered with the aircraft during the
  flight that need repair or correction.

2
Pilot Gripe Sheets

• The mechanics read and correct the problem, and
  then respond in writing on the lower half of the
  form what remedial action was taken, and the
  pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next
  flight. Never let it be said that ground crews
  and engineers lack a sense of humor.

3
Pilot Gripe Sheets

• Here are some actual logged maintenance
  complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas
  pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance
  engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major
  airline that has never had an accident.

4

• Problem
• left inside main tire almost needs replacement
• Solution
• almost replaced left inside main tire

5

• Problem
• test flight OK, except auto-land very rough
• Solution
• auto-land not installed on this aircraft

6

• Problem
• something loose in cockpit
• Solution
• something tightened in cockpit

7

• Problem
• dead bugs on windshield
• Solution
• live bugs on back-order

8

• Problem
• autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200
  feet per minute descent
• Solution
• cannot reproduce problem on ground

9

• Problem
• evidence of leak on right main landing gear
• Solution
• evidence removed

10

• Problem
• DME volume unbelievably loud
• Solution
• DME volume set to more believable level

11

• Problem
• friction locks cause throttle levers to stick
• Solution
• that's what they're there for

12

• Problem
• IFF inoperative
• Solution
• IFF always inoperative in OFF mode

13

• Problem
• suspected crack in windshield
• Solution
• suspect you're right

14

• Problem
• number 3 engine missing
• Solution
• engine found on right wing after brief search

15

• Problem
• aircraft handles funny
• Solution
• aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and
  be serious

16

• Problem
• target radar hums
• Solution
• reprogrammed target radar with lyrics

17

• Problem
• mouse in cockpit
• Solution
• cat installed

18

• Problem
• noise coming from under instrument panel. sounds
  like a midget pounding on something with a hammer
• Solution
• took hammer away from midget

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