Peter Navratil, CoFounder

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• Peter Navratil, Co-Founder
• A Program of Delphi Drug Alcohol Council

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Why Did We Organize Stand Up Guys?
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• Stand Up Guys started as a conversation between 3
  guys in 2004 dedicated to motivating and
  encouraging well-intentioned men to Listen,
  Learn, and Speak-Out about mens violence against
  women.

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Stand Up Guys Advisory Board

• Co-Founder Pete Navratil
• Co-Founder Jack Brennick
• Advisory Board Annie Lane
• Advisory Board Carly Wise
• Executive Director, William Fulton III, Delphi
  Drug Alcohol Council, Inc.
• www.standupguys.org - info_at_standupguys.org

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Hank Shaw - 2000
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The Mission

• To raise awareness about mens violence against
  women and girls and to promote gender equality in
  our community.

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The Vision

• Envisioning a world with liberty, justice, safety
  and equality for all!

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What is mens violence against women?

• Violence against women includes
• Domestic violence
• Rape or sexual assault
• Sexual harassment
• Stalking
• Gender discrimination
• And other behavior that demeans or devalues women
  and girls in our society.

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Jackson Katz challenges

• Isnt it about time we had a national
  conversation about the male causes of this
  violence, instead of lingering on its
  consequences in the lives if women?

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Ideals of Stand Up Guys

• It takes courage to stand up and speak,
• Courage is also what it takes to sit down and
  listen.
• Winston Churchill

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Courage to Sit, Listen Learn from Women

• To recognize the fact that men most frequently
  hear about violence against women from women, not
  men.
• Listen to the Voices of Victims Survivors
• To learn all we can about violence against women
  and what can be done to prevent it.

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As Men, we know victims
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Fathers Day Poll 2007 Peter D. Hart Research
Associates, Inc.

• More than half (56) of men think that it is very
  or fairly likely that, at some point in their
  lives, a woman or girl they know will be a victim
  of domestic violence or sexual assault only 15
  think it is not at all likely.
• The majority (56) of men have had reason to
  believe that a member of their immediate or
  extended family, a close friend, or an
  acquaintance has been in a domestic violence or
  sexual assault situation.

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Domestic Violence

• More women are injured by their partners than by
  rape, auto accidents and muggings combined!
• The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that
  intimate partners -- husbands, ex-husbands, and
  current and former boyfriends -- commit violent
  crimes against approximately 937,000 women every
  year.
• 1 in 4 women (greater than 25)have been victims
  of violence perpetrated by an intimate partner in
  their lifetime.

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Men, Women, and Homicide

• One-third of all female homicide victims are
  killed by an intimate partner, compared to 3-4
  of male homicide victims. (BJS, Family Violence,
  2005)
• Males were 83 of spouse murderers and 75 of
  murderers who killed a boyfriend/girlfriend.
  (Ibid.)
• The largest percentage of spousal murders are
  committed by white males 69, compared to 26
  black, and 5 others. (Ibid.)

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Power, Control Oppression

• Focus of this perspective is based on social
  hierarchy defined by sex, race, culture, sexual
  orientation, etc.

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Trauma

• Violence against women has long term consequences
  resulting in trauma and ongoing pain, anger, fear
  and frustration that continues throughout ones
  lifetime

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Victim Blaming

• In cases of Domistic Violence, we need to
  understand that change can be very difficult
  and complicated and to never blame a victim for
  staying in a relationship. The victim is Never
  responsible for her own victimization.
• Despite stigma shame, victims of rape or
  sexual assault are never to blame.

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Courage to Stand Up and Speak-Out

• Entitlement Privilege
• Collusion of silence that exists between well
  intentioned men
• Lack of accountability and courage to stand up to
  peers or be One of the Guys

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Male Stereotypes Masculinity

• Unhealthy male stereotypes and beliefs
  perpetuated by the media about what it is to be a
  man that support domination, power control in
  relationships that box us in and lead to
  unrealistic expectations about what it is to be a
  real man.

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Act Like A Man (aka the Boy Code)

• Gender Box

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Men Are -

• supposed to be
• supposed to do
• supposed to have
• not supposed to

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Act Like A Woman

• Gender Box

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Women Are -

• supposed to be
• supposed to do
• supposed to have
• not supposed to

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Fathering Violence

• For some men , parenting is not seen as real
  mans work.
• Experience it Some men were physically,
  emotionally or sexually abused by their fathers
• Witness it Some men grew up seeing their father
  physically and emotionally abuse their mother.

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Sexual Objectification of Women

• Sexist attitudes and beliefs that devalue and
  demean women and young girls
• Pornography, prostitution and the objectification
  of women as sexual objects in our culture

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Culture Of Fear

• To understand that women live in a culture of
  fear regarding men in general and that we, as
  men, can change that.

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Men, Consider This

• What steps do we take on a daily basis to keep
  from getting sexually assaulted?

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Now, Women

• What steps do you take on a daily basis to keep
  from getting sexually assaulted?

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So What do we do???
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Learn and Get Involved

• Acknowledge the fact that we may know women we
  love or care about who may have been victimized
• Have the courage to open the door and be willing
  to be interested and listen carefully to their
  stories.
• Ask if you can be helpful know where to refer
  for help.
• Take action to support and strengthen the
  existing values and beliefs among well
  intentioned men that sexual, physical and
  emotional abuse perpetrated by men against women
  and children is wrong and will no longer be
  tolerated.

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Not Just a Womens Issue Anymore

• We need to accept the fact Mens Violence Against
  Women is a public health and human rights issue.
• And, that this is not just a Women's Issue or
  a personal or private matter but a community
  issue that that affects all of us and requires
  men and womem working together as allies.

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Focus on new images of Masculinity

• The need to appreciate and value the differences
  between Men and Women and to treat each other
  with dignity and respect.
• Take responsibility for being loving and
  nurturing.
• Communicate feelings, warmth and genuine care and
  concern to those people who we love and care
  about.

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Educate Future Generations

• The need to educate our sons and other young men
  about the responsibility we share as Men in
  ending the mens violence against women.
• What does the future have in store?
• What will the world be like 20 years from now?
• More Courage Commitment From the Younger
  Generations Of Men

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About Being a Stand Up Guy!

• Being a Stand Up Guy is not about assessing blame
  or inflicting guilt, its about working and
  challenging men to get involved and do the right
  thing.
• I firmly believe that once the collective voices
  of men are heard together with the voices of
  women, Mens Violence in our community will end.

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The Stand Up Guys Pledge

• As a Stand Up Guy
• I pledge to treat all the women in my life with
  dignity, respect equality.
• I pledge to take the time to listen to the women
  in my life and to acknowledge that their
  perspective of the world is valuable and equally
  important as mine.
• I pledge to have the courage to speak out about
  sexist values, attitudes beliefs that
  perpetuate violence against women.
• I pledge to learn, practice teach non-violent
  methods to resolve conflict.

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Conclusion

• Mens Violence Against Women will continue in
  our communities until men take an active part in
  Standing Up and Speaking Out against the
  underlying cultural values, attitudes beliefs
  that support violence against women and reinforce
  the message that it is NOT OK to abuse, rape,
  hit, assault, objectify and control women.

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Closing Thoughts

• You must be the change you want to see in the
  world.
• Mahatma Gandhi
• Progress is not possible without deviation from
  the norm
• Frank Zappa

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Please Stand Up and Join Us!