Verbal and non verbal strategies

1
Verbal and non verbal strategies

• De-personalise the issue
• Why take the flak for something out of your
  control?If you have no influence over an issue
  then say so. Try not to sound like a jobs
  worth but if its not your decision but policy
  then say so.
• Personalise the issue
• If the aggression is directed at your
  professional role a little disclosure about
  yourself may encourage openness in others. You do
  not need to give them your life history but show
  yourself as an individual. You should also try to
  establish a relationship with them based on we
  ie we can try to work this out together

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• Asking for a particular behaviour
• You may need to ask for a specific behaviour to
  be carried out. You may also need to be assertive
  and raise your voice but DO NOT SHOUT at them. Be
  very clear about what you want them to do.
• Sit down and we can better than why dont you
  stop pacing up and down because its getting on
  my nerves and I cannot talk to you properly
  because you are not paying me any attention.
• let go of my arm is better than oh yea just
  what do you think you are going to do now

3

• Fogging
• You can block an irrelevant challenge made to you
  such as How can you help me ,you have never been
  homeless,mentally ill etc You could say I may
  never have been homeless,mentally ill etc but
  that should not stop me from working with you to
  solve the problem
• Distraction
• Re route the conversation to another subject
  and/or event

4

• Ask for delayed compliance
• Rather than standing over someone demanding that
  they do what you want immediately you could ask
  for delayed compliance. They are more likely to
  comply if you allow them some dignity and space
  ie I will be back in 5 mins and would like to
  see you .

5

• Non verbal tactics to diffuse
• Our non verbal behaviour can be a powerful
  indicator of how we really feel. It includes
  everything with the exception of the actual words
  we use. It includes the tone level and pitch of
  our voice,gestures,proximity etc. It is more
  powerful than the words we use and a major part
  of any interaction. People will believe non
  verbal language over verbal. Much of it is
  unconscious and must be employed subtly to have
  any positive effect.

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• Mood matching
• Try to match the arousal level of the other
  person. Try to put as much energy into your
  problem solving or however you are dealing with
  their problem as they are into being aggressive.
  DO NOT display your level of energy as aggression
  but rather interest,and concern. Slightly reduce
  your level of activity and try to being their
  level of aggression down.
• Eye contact
• Try to maintain normal eye contact. Avoid if at
  all possible the 3rd stage where eye contact is
  of high intensity, of long duration and aversive.

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• Mirroring
• We can reflect they way the other person is
  standing or sitting. This can happen naturally
  when people get on well or are in agreement. If
  we can subtly mirror the other person it can be
  quite effective in defusing the situation. DO NOT
  be perceived as mimicking or it will have the
  opposite effect.
• Squaring up
• People square up when they are being
  confrontational. Try to maintain a small angle
  between you and them. Try bending the knee
  without moving feet.

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• Personal Space
• Try not to crowd the other person. Violent people
  have been found to require about 3 times the
  personal space as non-violent people and as such
  can be more easily crowded in and feel uneasy or
  threatened.
• Trans cultural non-verbal communication within
  mental health.