BULLYING PREVENTION at Neil Armstrong School

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BULLYING PREVENTION at Neil Armstrong School

• Bullying is not allowed at Armstrong we will
  not have bullying when EVERYONE becomes a helpful
  friend and when there are no BYSTANDERS!
• Bullying Prevention Unit for Bettendorf
  Elementary Counseling Program, Created by
  Shelley Klaas, Counselor Neil Armstrong

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Bullies, Targets, Bystanders

• BULLY
• A bully is someone who is picking on or harassing
  someone else. He or she does not do this just
  once, but many times. Harassment is a pattern of
  this behavior over a period of time.
• TARGET
• A target is someone who is being picked on or
  harassed. A target is someone who has been hurt
  by a bully.
• BYSTANDER
• A bystander is someone who watches the bullying,
  but does nothing about it.
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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Bully-Proofing Our School

• Armstrongs Mission
• To make our school safe for our entire
  community. We will do this by
• Stop the behavior there are no-bullying rules
  at our school. Every teacher and staff member
  will enforce these rules.
• The Armstrong counseling program will teach
  students about bullies, targets, and
  bystanders, helping every student to acquire the
  skills to handle bullying as well as to stop
  bullying behavior by refusing to be a bystander!
• What the students will do speak out! Students
  will help each other. They will not be afraid to
  do the right thing (stick up for the target and
  tell bullies, no more) or to get an adult to
  help.
• How students will treat each other the students
  will use extra effort to INCLUDE EVERYONE and to
  use our Armstrong motto of TREAT PEOPLE RIGHT AND
  DO THE RIGHT THING!
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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WHAT IS BULLYING???

• Bullying happens when one person is more powerful
  than the other because s/he is bigger, more
  popular or has more friends, and/or because he
  or she can make the other person feel less
  important.
• Bullying is not usually a one time problem it
  is a repeated series of negative or hurtful
  behavior over time.
• Bullying can be done by one person or a group.
• Bullying is sometimes done to gain attention,
  popularity, or power and control.
• Bullying can be done to get ones way or to gain
  material things.
• Bullying usually happens between children who are
  not friends and who dont usually play together.
  Sometimes, however, a friend can turn on
  another friend with bullying behavior.
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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SOME PEOPLE THINK

• Bullying is funny.
• Bullying is just a normal part of life.
• Its not bullying behavior if the person says,
  just kidding!
• Talking about someone behind his or her back
  (when that person is not around) isnt bullying.
• If someone bullies, its okay to get revenge.
• If you just ignore bullying, it will go away.
• THESE PEOPLE ARE WRONG!!!
• Bullying isnt funny.
• Bullying isnt just a part of growing up no one
  should have to put up with bullying or being
  bullied!
• If someone says, just kidding but they continue
  the behavior when they know you dont like it or
  it is hurtful, that person is a bully!
• Rumor spreading and gossiping are bullying
  behaviors!
• Getting revenge usually makes the problem bigger
  and worse.
• Ignoring bullying wont make it go away!
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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So what is the difference between bullying and
conflict?

• Bullying usually happens in secrecy or out of the
  way places...Conflict often happens where others
  can see it.
• Bullying usually involves one person being
  targetedConflict may involve a number of people
  and there are no targets.
• When bullying happens, threats are often used and
  bullies hurt people with words and/or actions.
  When conflict happens, it may involve fighting
  but both people fight (and it usually stops
  quickly!)
• Bullies are not usually friends with their
  targets. In a conflict, friends or classmates
  usually work out their problems.
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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How Do People Bully?1. By
physical aggressiontripping, pushing, shoving,
hitting, destroying someone elses things,
etc.2. By socially alienating through
gossiping, spreading rumors, excluding from a
group, humiliating in front of everyone,
threatening to keep out of the group, etc.3.
By verbal aggression such as mocking, name
calling, teasing, intimidating phone calls or
email, or verbal threats.4. By intimidating
through playing a dirty trick, taking
possessions, trying to get someone to do
something that is wrong, threatening to harm
someone the person cares about, etc.Created by
Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong Elementary
School, Bettendorf, Iowa
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Why-oh-why?Why Do People Bully?To get
power.To gain popularity.To get attention or
material things.To act out problems they are
having at home or at school or..just because
they feel like it! Created by Shelley Klaas,
Counselor, Armstrong Elementary School,
Bettendorf, Iowa
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Who is likely to be a bully???

• A child who does not have EMPATHY. (Remember,
  empathy means trying to understand how the other
  person feels.)
• A child who does not feel guilty when s/he hurts
  another.
• A child who likes being aggressive.
• A child who believes the target deserves what
  happened.
• A child who likes to be in charge and get his or
  her own way a child who likes to have POWER.
• A child whose parents or older siblings are
  bullying him or her.
• A child who thinks someone else is treating him
  or her badly.
• ANY CHILD CAN BE A BULLY! (But dont let it be
  you!!!)
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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Who is likely to be a target???

• A child who is isolated or alone during much of
  the school day.
• A child who feels a little more anxious, nervous,
  or insecure.
• A child who is smaller or weaker and unable to
  defend him or herself.
• A child who cries easily, gives up when bullied,
  or cant stick up for him or herself.
• A child who has some kind of disability.
• A child who has been hurt at home.
• A child who teases or bothers other children.
• A child who tries not to give in to the bully,
  but gets very upset when she or he does lose.
• A child by whom the bully may be threatened
  (because the bully sees him or her as more
  popular, better at a sport or activity, etc.)
• ANY CHILD CAN BECOME THE TARGET OF A BULLY!
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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SO WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?

• How to show I CARE if someone is bullied
• Creative problem-solving (with someone you trust)
• Adult help dont be afraid to get it!
• Respond to bullying (do not be a bystander stand
  up!)
• Empathy (try to understand how others feel and
  use that understanding to treat people right and
  do the right thing!)
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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RULES FOR BULLY-PROOFING OUR CLASSROOM

• We will not bully other students no gossip, no
  rumor spreading, no excluding, no threatening or
  harassing, no tricks, etc.
• We will help others who are being bullied by
  speaking out and getting adult help.
• We will use extra effort to include all students
  in activities at our school.
• We will treat others the way we would like to be
  treated!
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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How to Help Ourselves

• Lets Try the Ha, Ha, So Strategies!
• Help - know when and how to ask for it!
• Assert yourself (not passive/not aggressive.)
• Humor try to use it to de-escalate a situation.
• Avoid try the avoid strategy when you know you
  might encounter a bullying situation or a bully.
• Self-talk use clear mind thinking to keep your
  self-esteem up and to help you think of
  solutions.
• Options/others use the best option you can
  think of for the situation (and use others to
  help you!)
• Remember if you are being bullied, it is not
  your fault. Ask for help! If you see bullying,
  do not be a bystander! Stick up for the target
  and get help if you need it. Most importantly
  if we ALL refuse to allow bullying at Armstrong,
  it will not happen, so lets do this TOGETHER as
  a Caring Community!
• Created by Shelley Klaas, Counselor, Armstrong
  Elementary School, Bettendorf, Iowa

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If youre tempted to bully.

• Try these conflict resolution skills
• If youre angry, cool down take a few deep
  breaths, count to ten, get a drink, take a break
  from the situation, etc.
• When youre ready to talk, try to state your view
  of the problem. Use I statements and try to
  avoid those starting with you or blaming
• I think we have a problem because
• Im angry because
• I want to talk to you about
• Try to use active listening when the other person
  is talking.
• Brainstorm win-win solutions.
• Pick a solution and talk about how you will try
  it.
• Remember to ask yourself
• Is it safe?
• How will the other person feel?
• Is it fair?
• Will it work?
• REMEMBER All of our feelings are okay, its
  what we do with them that counts. Anger is the
  most difficult feeling to handle, so dont be
  afraid to ask for help. Your counselor can help
  you learn to manage your feelings.

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CREATING A CARING COMMUNITY!

• Only YOU can do it!
• Take an honest look at teasing and bullying
• Do I tease, exclude, or bully in any way?
• Have I laughed when someone else was being
  hurt?
• Have I stood up or stood by?
• Can I make a change starting today?
• WITH YOUR HELP, ARMSTRONG WILL BE A SAFE PLACE
  FOR EVERYONE!
• Bullying Prevention Unit for Bettendorf
  Elementary Counseling Program, Created by
  Shelley Klaas, Counselor Neil Armstrong

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A film to watch and discuss