Megan Whalley

1
Megan Whalleys Diary

• 16 years old
• Dan Stewart - 20 years old

2
Megan Whalley
3
7/29/91

• Lance didnt show up. But like I said, I had a
  good time without him, because I met some one
  else. I feel bad because I dont want Lance
  picking up on other girls. I got a guys phone
  number. It was weird. I dont know how it
  happened. Heather was talking to him. Then he
  asked for my number and Heather gave it to him
  and he gave me his. While we were there he put
  his arm around me. Once we hugged. Then he left.
  I came in and 5 minutes later he called. We
  talked for 2 hours.

4
7/29/91

• His name is Dan and hes 20 years old. We were
  just getting to know each other and he said if
  you do something about your boyfriend well go
  out Friday. Now I have to do something about
  Lance. Im supposed to call Dan in a few minutes.
  Ill try to call Lance tonight.
• I called Dan and we talked for almost an hour. He
  said he wanted to take me to Magic Mountain. Last
  night on the phone he kept calling me a
  sweetheart. He asked me out on a date for Friday.
  I paged Lance and Dan at the same time and Lance
  never called back, but I talked to Dan 3 times
  today. I need to let Lance know its over with
  us, but I cant tell him if I cant get a hold of
  him.

5
7/30/91

• I talked to Dan 3 times today and he is going to
  call me when he gets home. Ive talked to Lance 0
  times today. I think Dan really likes me. He is
  going to surprise me on our date. I like him
  When Dan called me after work he said, Hey
  sexy, to me.

6
8/2/91 Friday

• I talked to Dan last night. He read me poems of
  slow songs, which made me cry. He said if
  anything happens we would have a song (which he
  played for me last night). Im excited about
  tonight. I hope hes not shy. This time when he
  called me babe.

7
8/3/91

• Our date was really fun. I had to pick him up,
  but I didnt mind. First we went to El Torito for
  dinner. Then we went to Family Fun Center to ride
  the go-carts. After that we went and got ice
  cream. During this whole time we never even held
  hands.
• Well, next we went to the movies. During the
  movie he grabbed my hand and held on to it. So
  now it was my turn to make a move, so I kissed
  him. After the movie I drove him home. We sat in
  the car in front of his house for a while. We
  listened to the radio and our song came on and I
  kissed him again.

8
8/3/91

• It was time for him to get out so I could go
  home. So we kissed good-bye. Ive went out with
  Lance for almost 4 months and we never French
  kissed. I go out with Dan on 1 date and were
  all over each other. I didnt even kiss Lance
  until we were going out for awhile. Dan didnt
  get one peck. Like Lance got. I cant wait to
  see him again.
• I got home at 2 oclock and my mom was upset. So
  I dont know when I can see him again. But I
  really like him. I cant believe he likes me too.
  Hes 20 years old. Damn Im good. Lance was my
  1st boyfriend, but 2nd the best.

9
Megan Whalley
10
8/12/91

• 2 Weeks Later
• Dan called Heathers house while I was there. He
  told her he was coming over. Well, he wasnt
  kidding. Shaun came over too. So we sat in her
  front yard. I sat in Dans lap. Once I was
  sitting across from him and he whispered, I love
  you. I dont know if Im ready to tell him I
  love him. He wants me to come over tomorrow and
  go swimming. I dont know.

11
8/16/91 and 8/18/91

• I went out with Dan tonight. We went to play
  miniature golf. Then we went to his friends
  house, who was having a party. It was boring. So
  we went to his house. And you know what we did
  there. He said he cant wait to get into a fight
  so we can have fun making up.
• So we drove to the beach. We looked at the
  water, and kissed. I told him I love him for the
  first time.

12
8/22/91 and 8/23/91

• I went to Dans house, but Dans grandfather was
  home so we drove around. And when we came back
  he was gone. So we went into his room, and
  watched T.V. for half an hour. After that we
  started kissing and touching. He wanted to take
  my shirt off. (I had another shirt.) Soon after
  that all my clothes were off. So I worked on
  getting his clothes off Then it happened and we
  were having sex. I was nervous Im not a virgin
  anymore.
• Three weeks later, Dan told Bill about us
  sleeping together last night. I want to tell my
  friends but I dont want my mom to know not
  yet.

13
8/28/91 and 8/29/91

• I went to Dans house, then we went to C.J.s.
  At C.J.s we saw his ex Kim. I think shes
  pretty. While we were there he kept hinting that
  he wanted to go to his house. Like it was cool
  tonight. Well we did go to his house, but we
  didnt do anything. We were emotional. We
  hugged a lot and I cried. He tried to cry. We
  only kissed a little.
• I went to Dans house for the afternoon. We went
  to his room. He wanted to go to the beach
  tonight, but I cant. So I hope I can see him
  tomorrow night. Lance called 2 times today. I
  like him still but I love Danny.

14
9/8/91 and 9/14/91

• Then I went to his house today. Then we came to
  my house for dinner then we went back to his
  house and well, he was horny so we had sex I
  dont want to say this but I think he pushes me
  into having sex. I mean he always wants it. But I
  love him.
• Remember I said Dan had something to ask me?
  Well, last night he asked me to marry him. I
  think he was serious. But I didnt take it that
  way at first. Im going to his house tonight.

15
9/30/91

• Two months later.
• Dan left his pager here. So now he pages me all
  the time. He called after work something is up.
  He says hell do anything for me. Then he says
  will you do anything for me? He wants something.
  He said he would call back. Im dying to know
  whats up with him.
• I was so worried, but the thing he wanted was to
  use my car for an interview. So he is going to
  use it while Im at school, then hes going to
  pick me up. So I get to be with him tomorrow
  night.

16
10/1/91

• I told Dan I was sick so that I wouldnt have to
  come over. But hes upset. Hes trying to get me
  to come over. He called and said he needed to
  know if I was coming. I said, No. He was upset
  and we just hang up. Not even an I love you. I
  dont know what Im going to do about him. Hes
  getting unbearable. I love him, but hes
  obsessed. He always had to be with me. I cant
  break up with him. I dont know what I can do.

17
10/8/91 and 10/28/91

• Lance called!! I talked to Dan. I miss him. HE
  found out Im writing a diary. So he got mad
  because I wouldnt read some to him.
• We talked about names for baby. Weird
  conversation. He wants a baby. I do too. Just not
  so soon. Im getting nervous. It would be so easy
  for me to get pregnant because we dont use any
  protection. I want a baby but not now.

18
11/3/91 and 12/01/91

• WE had a tiff. We didnt speak for a while. But
  we made up. Im tired of him pressuring me.
  When I tell him I dont want to. But hes a
  horn dog. Sex, sex, sex.
• I told Dan I was sick so that I wouldnt have to
  come over. But hes upset. Hes trying to get
  me to come over. He called and said he needed to
  know if I was coming. I said no. He was upset.
  And he just hung up. Not even an I love you. I
  dont know what Im going to do about him. Hes
  getting unbearable. I love him but hes
  obsessed, he always has to be with me. I cant
  break up with him. I dont know what I can do.

19
12/08/91

• Ive talked to him a few times today. He wanted
  to come over I wont get to see him until
  Saturday. He said he gave me that rose for our 4
  month anniversary. Hes so sweet. I wrote him a
  latter. All about our weekend. I love him.
  When we were fighting he was crying on my
  shoulder wanting me to forgive him. 1 fight in 4
  months is not bad. He says hell change. He
  realizes Im not like him. I love him more now
  than ever.
• Lance called the other night. He asked my mom
  what I want for X-mas. She told him a new
  boyfriend. And he said how about an old one.
  Sounds like he still likes me. But Ive got the
  best boyfriend.

20
12/17/91 and 12/25/91

• I started school late so Dan and Mike came over
  this morning. When I left for school I found out
  Dan snooped around in my room and found one of my
  journals.
• For X-Mas he made me open my present last. Inside
  that big box was a lot of little presents. Then
  at the bottom was a ring.

21
01/08/92

• January 1, 1992!! This was the best New Years
  Eve of my life. We got a motel room. We made
  love. Then we read my diary ... Then we took a
  shower. We made love as the year changed. It
  was so wonderful. The night before (12/31) we
  got into a fight. But to make up, we had sex in
  my car. Something I said I would never do.

22
1/29/92

• Dan and I are arguing. Hes mad because I cant
  or wont come over. I wont try to talk to my
  mom. He said it sounds like I dont want to see
  him. I wont be able to see him tomorrow either.
• He said he wont stop trying to see me. And if I
  dont try things will get worse. I guess hes
  going to come over tomorrow. So he says.

23
2/8/92

• Dan asked me to go to Rock-n-bowl tonight. Well,
  I didnt want to. So we argued about that. He
  came over and I said I thought weve been seeing
  each other too much. He said he hopes hes not
  losing me, because the next thing I be wanting
  to see other people.

24
2/17/92 and 3/8/92

• We had a good weekend. We barely fought I spent
  the afternoon with him today. Tomorrow Im going
  with him to buy suits. (He took the diary I
  wrote about Lance).
• He Dan came over at 11 and we did mailing for
  his job. Then my grandparents came over. Things
  were fine. Until he asked me to do something and
  I argued with him. So we got in a BIG fight. It
  was so big that he almost broke up with me. I
  even thought he did. This is it, if I screw up
  again then its over.

25
3/11/92 and 3/18/92

• I drove to school, and Dan was still there after
  school. I watched him play basketball. Then I
  went to his house. Things werent like they
  usually are. He was mad at everything I did or
  didnt do. Like I didnt kiss him, so when I did
  he didnt want one.
• He used my car today. Then I went to the park
  with him and he came over when he was done. We
  hadnt fought in 5 days. Then today we had it
  out because I wont wear the shirt he bought me.
  But we made up.

26
3/22/92

• My mom said I couldnt go anywhere. That pissed
  Dan off. I told him not to come over. I told
  him to expletive off and he hung up. Then he
  called back and said Id better be there at 15
  minutes after 12 or it will be the beginning of
  the end. Im not going over there. I wont take
  his threats. Let him break up with me. Sometime
  I wish he would.

27
5/2/92 and 5/6/92

• Last night was hell. I told him I wanted to see
  other people. Well we broke up. I wanted to
  still see each other and go out, but he didnt
  want that. He rode home at 11. He called me at
  1230 to say he was okay. Then we made up and we
  decided things will be different. We wont be
  seeing each other as much. And if I lie once he
  said he will never see me again. (Ive been
  thinking about Lance a lot lately. I wish I
  could give him another chance.)
• 9 months Happy Anniversary. Ya right. All weve
  been doing is fighting. He wants me to take a
  bus to see him Saturday. I said no. So he got
  mad.

28
7/1/92

• Lance (old boyfriend) called while I was gone. I
  hope he calls back. Lance did call back while I
  was on the phone with Dan. And Dan knew. Im in
  deep shit. Dan hates me. He broke my sunglasses.
  He said a lot of mean things. Now I have to call
  back tonight and apologize to him. I wish it was
  easier to get over him. I wish he would get it
  through his head that Im not going to go back
  with him. He tells me I better figure out what I
  want.

29
7/92

• My mom asked me if I had to make the decision
  right now, what would I do? I told her I would
  keep it, and she went off the wall again. Saying
  how I would ruin my life, because if you went
  into the marines, we would have to get married
  and I could forget about taking my car, and our
  baby wouldnt have anything
• I LOVE YOU!
• I MISS YOU!
• I NEED YOU!
• I WANT YOU!
• xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
• Kiss the baby!

30
8/3/92 and 8/6/92

• What a mess. Dan needed me to come over. So I
  did, but I couldnt stay. He was going to leave
  or kill himself. I was worried about him. The
  next day he was at Julies I went to see him.
  On Wednesday 8/5 we went out, but we fought.
• Dan came by and wanted me to go out. I ended up
  going. He got a motel room and we had a good
  time.

31
8/8/92 and 8/9/92

• I spent the afternoon with Dan. We went to the
  movies. Tomorrow were going to the beach.
• The beach was hell. All we did was fight. Now
  were not talking. I think its over. He said
  Im not worth talking to, so when he called, I
  hung up. He told my mom I need to grow up. I
  dont need him. Lance called. He ships out
  Tuesday for 3 weeks. I cant wait until he comes
  home.

32
8/10-15/92 and 8/17/92

• One day I was supposed to take Dan to look for a
  job, but the night before we fought. I still
  went but he ended up driving to Big Bear. Sat.
  I went to his sisters all day. In the end we
  had a huge fight. I slapped him and he took my
  rings. He burned all my things from Lance. He
  wont break up with me I cant bring myself to
  do it.
• I went to the beach Dan was really upset
  because I said I would not go if he couldnt go.
  He kept calling and threatened me. Then he came
  over and told me to break up with him. So I did
  but we didnt.

33
No Journal 1993
34
Nicholas is Born 12/5/93

• 2/8/94
• I decided to start writing in a journal again. I
  just hope it doesnt get me into trouble. Things
  are going good with me and Dan. He has a good job
  and a car and a place to live. Weve talked about
  getting an apartment and getting married.
  Nicholas, who is

35
2/8/94

• Now 2 months old, and doing great, is growing
  like a weed. I love him to death. I still cant
  believe I have a baby. Im in college at night.
  Things are rocky with my parents. I saw Lance
  last in December. And he calls me once in a
  while. He told my mom he would take me and the
  baby back. But his chance was over a long time
  ago. Because now I am going to try and make
  things work with Dan.

36
2/13/94

• Baby is two months old.
• On Friday night I took the baby to Dans house
  and I didnt feel like making out and he got mad.
  We got into a huge fight and he wouldnt let me
  take the baby home. He hit me. I was hitting him.
  He threw me out and threw out the babys things.
  Well on Saturday I called to apologize and
  Saturday night I went to his house. So now things
  are better.
• Dan thinks Lance is still in Arizona or Texas.
  So Im safe with him not find out about Lance
  coming over and giving me a Valentine's gift.
  What Dan doesnt know wont hurt him.

37
2/14/94 and 2/19/94

• Lance called to say Happy Valentines Day. I
  didnt even get to see Dan today. He said he
  would make it up to me. (How many times has he
  told me that?) Besides his way of making up is
  having sex. Anyway it wont be the same
  Valentines Day is over. At least I wasnt
  totally forgotten. I still got a gift from
  Lance.
• I wonder what is going on with Dan. The other
  day he told me he stays up at night thinking. I
  guess he doesnt like his job. And who knows
  what else is wrong. I want to call him, but I
  dont know what to say to him. Ill wait until
  tomorrow. I got lucky. Dan almost saw the card
  from Lance. I would be dead if he saw it. He
  thinks I havent talk to Lance in a long time.

38
2/23/94

• I called Dan because he was supposed to get paid
  and he owes me money. He didnt answer his phone
  or my page. I was calling all night and I was
  getting worried So I went over there. When I saw
  him still in bed this morning, I knew he had lost
  his job. He wouldnt tell me what happened. Im
  going back over there when my mom gets home. I
  cant believe this is happening again. I dont
  know if I can take it. I will go crazy if he
  loses anything. I cant stand by and watch him
  lose all he has worked hard to get back. I wont
  be able to stand it if he lives on the street
  again (his rent is due I hope he can pay it).

39
2/23/94 and 3/2/94

• He has to get another job soon because now he has
  a baby to support. Its a good thing I get
  welfare of we would be really bad off.
• HOW COULD HE LET THIS HAPPEN ???
• Dan hasnt had any luck finding a job. He hasnt
  been trying that hard. I guess my plans to go to
  Magic Mountain for my birthday are shot. I wont
  even get a present from him this year. ( I would
  if he had a job. )

40
3/4/94

• I cant believe what happened. Well first Lance
  called and he asked me what I was doing tonight.
  I told him nothing. Then he asked if he could
  rent a movie and watch it with me. I told him I
  had to call him back. I tried to get ahold of
  Dan all day. When he finally called he was an
  asshole. So I called Lance back and said it was
  okay. He came over at about 715. We started
  the movie at about 8 oclock and my mom and Jesse
  left so it was just me and Lance. We just sat
  next to each other for a while. He played with
  Nicholas and he walked with him. When the baby
  went to bed he got me involved. He started
  tickling me. (I said if you keep doing that Ill
  have to find where youre ticklish. He kept on
  doing it.)

41

• He rubbed my feet and gave me a back rub. He
  stayed even after the movie was over. He left at
  1100 and I walked him out to his car. We stood
  there and talked. Then we hugged. Not like
  weve hugged before. This time it was more
  intimate. Then we held hands for a second and
  hugged again. He said he would call and see what
  I was doing tomorrow. Unfortunately I have to
  see Dan. I dont feel bad about seeing Lance
  behind Dans back. I guess I should. Its kind
  of fun sneaking around. Dan will never know.

42
3/5/94 and 3/16/94

• Dan came over (to get money). He got pissed when
  I told him I dont have any. Then he called and
  said he doesnt like liars. Well Im not lying.
  I dont have to put up with this shit with Lance.
  (I dont know why I put up with it with Dan.) I
  love Nicholas, but now I am stuck with Dan. Who
  I dont want to be with right now.
• Dan was an asshole today. What else is new. I
  havent got my check so I have no money and Dan
  takes all my change. What a jerk. Next time I
  see Lance I am doing it (Kiss him).
• Lance came over I was so nervous standing
  outside. I was afraid Dan would drive by. Lance
  kissed me on the head. (I couldnt do it). But
  it will happen. I just hope this doesnt blow up
  in my face. If Dan ever found out he would be
  furious.

43
3/18/94 and 3/20/94

• Lance came over. We watched T.V. He held me more
  affectionately than you would even a close
  friend. My mom said I light up when he calls. I
  used to do that with Dan. Lance treats me so
  much better than Dan. Outside we hugged a lot and
  he kissed me on the cheek. (Were getting
  closer). I like being with him. With Dan I
  cant wait until he leaves.
• Today is Dans birthday. He called this morning
  being a jerk and then he wanted me to come over.
  Im sick of his attitude. Lance doesnt do this
  shit to me. Dan can spend his birthday the same
  way I spent mine alone. I havent heard from
  Lance today.

44
4/4/94 and 4/8/94

• Dan was such an asshole last night because I
  wouldnt go to the motel. He kept calling and he
  wouldnt let me go to sleep. I cried my eyes
  out. Then today he tries to be nice. Well I
  wont forgive him. Im sick of the way he treats
  me. I cant wait until Lance comes home. I
  wont be able to stand it if he stays longer than
  a week.
• Dan is an asshole again today. And he let me
  know that Im a bitch.

45
4/17/94

• Things are really bad. Dan and I went to get ice
  cream. And then we parked to talk. He told me he
  had to let me go. I think hes giving up on
  looking for a job. And me. We sat in the car for
  a long time and I wanted to go in. I got out and
  he told me to wait a minute, but I started
  walking towards the house. So he hit his
  windshield with his fist and cracked it a few
  times. I dont know if Ill see him again. He
  doesnt have anywhere to go but he can be so
  stubborn. I never wanted this to happen. But I
  still want him and his situation anymore. But I
  still want him around for Nicholas. Ill just
  have to wait and see if he comes over today.

46
5/30/94

• I had quite a night last night. I was wrong
  about Lance not really caring about me. He
  called and asked if I wanted company. Well a
  minute later he was at the door. He called me
  from a pay phone by my house. We watch t.v. and
  he held me a lot. He held Nicholas. Then he was
  kissing my neck and chewing on my ear. Dan
  called while he was here, but he hung up on me
  and never called back. Lance stayed for 3 hours
  then I walked him outside where we talked and
  hugged for ½ an hour. I told him I wasnt going
  out with Dan. He said he doesnt like playing
  games. Like sneaking around. Well Im sorry but
  we have to. Dan would kill me and Lance if he
  knew. Before Lance left (we hesitated for a
  while) we kissed. .. He said hed been waiting
  for that. This is a mess. I have to be very
  careful.

47
6/10/94 and 6/18/94

• It was another one of those days. Dan came over
  to get the baby and he went in my room to try and
  find Brads number. He looked everywhere.
  Then he starts digging in my trash. He gets to
  the bottom and he found an envelope to Lance and
  then a letter that I never sent. So he get
  raged.
• Dan took me to Magic Mountain. We had a good
  time. We left early and went to his house and
  made love. We actually got along.

48
6/24/94

• Last night was hell. Dan had the baby for the
  night Being with Lance was the only good part
  about last night The hell started when I got
  home. Dan was pissed because I didnt call when
  I got home, plus he knew I wasnt babysitting
  Im so tired of Dan doing this to me. I wish he
  would leave me alone. I want to go on, but Ill
  never be able to. Ill always have to sneak
  around. Now I did it! Dan knew I didnt babysit.
  I told him I saw Lance. He flew off the wall.
  We were in my car and he cracked my windshield
  and broke my radio, but the worst is he was
  telling me he was going to get Nicholas taken
  away. He scares me when he does that.

49
6/30/94 and 7/3/94

• Heather drove by and Dan remembered when I told
  him I went over there. He would have talked to
  her so I told him I didnt go over there. He got
  pissed. I didnt tell him I took the baby to
  Lances. He would of killed me.
• Tonight he Dan got mad because he doesnt think
  I care about his feelings. I cant help him. So
  he was talking crazy. Saying hell show everyone
  who hurt him. I cant deal with this again.

50
7/6/94

• Dan is serious about going out with a sign to get
  a job. Guess who has to take him? He got all of
  his things out today, so hell probably sleep in
  my car tonight (and every other night).

51
7/14/94 and 7/24/94

• Dan and I took Nicky to Disneyland. Then we went
  back with Jesse and his friend. We even argued
  at Disneyland. I was getting mad because he
  wouldnt keep his hands off of me.
• I cant take this much longer. If it werent for
  Nicholas, Dan would be history. Dan and I are
  having all these problems and Im always thinking
  about Lance. Hes a dork, but he treats me so
  nice.

52
Nicholas is 8 months old
53
8/1/94

• Dan took a baby for a walk. When he came back no
  one was here. He came into my room and pushed
  redial on my phone. While he was gone I called
  Lance. Dan hung up on him and Lance called back.
  Dan picked up the phone and said, If you talk to
  Megan again Ill kill you. Then he grabbed the
  baby and walked off. He took my wallet and told
  me to come pick him up. He got in to drive and
  started driving to the beach. Well, I whined and
  cried to take me home. Anyway, he forgave me. I
  wish he would stay mad. Maybe then he would leave
  me alone.

54
8/2/94 and 8/3/94

• I took Dan to the welfare office. He was
  supposed to get his food stamps but he didnt.
  Now Im screwed.
• Dan was here early. I was calling Legal Aid to
  file custody papers. Dan was outside my window
  and he pulled the screen open and pulled the
  phone out. So he was all pissed about that.
  Then the phone was for me about a trade school
  and Dan comes in and hangs up the phone. I
  scream at him and slap him.

55
8/20/94

• Dan said when he gets his food stamps hes going
  to Washington or Oceanside. When have I heard
  this before? Ill have to wait and see. I doubt
  it will happen. Not with my luck.

56
12/5/94

• Nicholas Birthday!! I cant believe he is
  already a year old. Dan is off on a trip. Now
  hes saying that hes going to kill himself. And
  if I want to keep Nicholas, the Id better be
  nice to him until then. I would be sad if he did,
  but I would get over it, because he is ruining my
  life and if that is the only way hell leave me
  alone---then---I dont think hell actually do
  it. He said this before.

57
12/12/94

• Dan was supposed to go to Eddies, but he didnt.
  He said if nothing happens by January 1st then
  he would leave. I dont know what he means by
  that. But I do think I would be happier if I
  didnt have to deal with him.

58
12/26/94

• The Day After X-Mas
• I told Dan 1 week and if he doesnt have a job
  then thats it. I cant take it anymore. I know
  he wont have a job. My mom is trying hard to get
  papers so that I will have custody of Nicholas.
• One of these days I will be away from Dan.

59

• Christmas sucked. I got good gifts but Dan made
  it suck because he was an asshole on X-mas Eve.
  He was mad because he had to sleep in the car
  We went to his Grandmas house. All of his
  family was there. They were nice to me, Dan was
  being an asshole. Then he didnt get any
  presents so he was upset. Then I found out he
  took money from me, he said because I lied about
  it, so he took it to teach me a lesson.
• Ive had it with Dan. He had the baby outside
  and he was walking off with him I was grabbing
  the baby. He gave him to me I brought him back
  in. Dan comes in the house goes to my phone, I
  called Lance last.

60

• I told him to get his stuff out, not to sleep in
  my car. Its over. I hate him, I dont want
  anything to do with him. He made me give him
  money so he could leave he took the cordless
  phone.
• Lance called shortly after. He is so sweet. He
  always makes me feel better He is still waiting
  for me. He has never called me a name or put me
  down.

61
12/29/94 and 12/31/94

• I hate Dan for what he is doing to me. I wish he
  would leave me and the baby alone.
• Nothing has changed. Dan still comes over every
  day at 830 and he still sleeps in my car. He
  still has to know everything I do. Its New
  Years Eve and I have no plans.
• The only good thing about this year was Nicholas.
  Things between me and Dan were terrible the whole
  year and now its over. Maybe in 1995 I can have
  something good happen with Lance.

62
1/3/95

• Dan was here all day. He drove me crazy. Nothing
  has changed. We took Nicky to get some test done.
  Turns out that there is nothing wrong with him.
• Dan says hell probably have a job in a day or so
  and then he said Ill never want to leave him.
  Yea right. Even if he had a good job and a place
  to stay, I still dont want to be with him. I
  dont know what I can do to get that through his
  head. I dont love him anymore.

63
1/9/95 - Last Entry

• I know we will have a big argument about this
  tomorrow When I got to Lances he was still in
  the shower. We went and got ice cream. Then we
  watched TV. He didnt try anything. Outside we
  hugged. He asked me what I wanted. I told him I
  didnt know. But that I wanted Dan out of my
  live. Then I kissed him (peck) to let him know I
  careWhen I got home I thought I was free, but as
  soon as I got in the door, Dan called me. He said
  I hope you had a good time and I walked in. I
  know hell be an asshole tomorrow.

64
Description of the Next Day 1/10/95
65
Megan was beaten to death by Dan.
66
Dan then took Nicholas and drove off a cliff on
Ortega Highway killing the baby.
67
(No Transcript)
68
1/10/95 Megans Death Certificate

• Time of death 1250 p.m.
• Immediate cause of death Asphyxiation due to
  strangulation

69
1/11/95 Dannys Arrest Report

• Subj. Danny Stewart killed his girlfriend,
  vict. Megan W., at her residence in Orange.
  Subj. fled the residence, taking his and Megans
  13 month old son, Nicholas Stewart and Megans
  vehicle. Subj. drove to an area on the Ortega
  Highway in Riverside County and Deliberately
  drove the veh. Off an approx. 300 cliff in an
  effort to kill himself and the child, Nicholas.
  Subj. Stewart survived the crash and was
  transported to Riverside General Hospital. I
  contact the subj. Arrested him and then
  interviewed him. Subj. was booked in the
  Riverside County Jail Ward at the hospital on
  1-11-95 at 2340 hrs., booking number 9501242.

70
1/12/95 Criminal Complaint

• On or about January 10, 1995, DANNY EUGENE
  STEWART, in violation of Section 187(a) of the
  Penal Code (MURDER), a FELONY, did willfully and
  unlawfully and with malice aforethought murder
  Megan, a human being.
• On or about January 10, 1995, DANNY EUGENE
  STEWART, in violation of Section 187(a) of the
  Penal Code (MURDER), a FELONY, did willfully and
  unlawfully and with malice aforethought murder
  Nicholas, a human being.