Communication Differences Between the Sexes

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Communication Differences Between the Sexes
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Socialization affects Communication Patterns

• Peer groups
• girls tend to establish harmony and cooperation
• boys tend to establish dominance and power

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Socialization affects Communication Patterns

• In Conversations
• Boys value aggressiveness, arguing, storytelling,
  ostentatious behavior, and tend to dominate
  conversation
• More likely to interrupt

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Socialization affects Communication Patterns

• In Conversations
• Girls seek approval, contribute to conversation
  instead of interrupt, use listening cues, make
  use of indirectness (more on this later)

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Language

• Very important in socializing
• Words are symbols in which we give meanings
• They do three things
• 1. Define
• 2. Describe
• 3. Evaluate

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Language

• Draw the most typical person w/typical name
• Language affects women in 3 ways
• 1.) Ignores Them
• Generic he (Ex caveman)
• There is no gender neutral pronoun (only he, she,
  it)

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Language

• Only 25 named a female when asked to draw a
  person so for most of us, the typical is male
• 2.) Defines women
• Female is defined by relationship she has w/a
  male
• Surnames link to father or husband

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Language

• For a female, a name should be a non issue
• Feminists argue changing your name is a loss of
  identity
• Religion of child follows mother so why doesnt
  the name?
• Historically, wife and children were considered
  property

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Language

• 3.) Deprecates Women - puts them down
• Names of men women who get around (player vs.
  slut)
• We downplay things that are female such as the
  male vs. female form of a word
• Female usually ends in ess

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Language

• Example Governor v. governess
• Study professors were sent journal articles to
  rate
• Were identical except for the name of the author
• Females were rated less than if male names were
  on articles
• Females often use pen names

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Patterns of Communication

• Words hurt and heal
• How would you feel if you were constantly
  criticized?
• Men solve (find solutions) and women process
  (talk about it) and then solve
• Females are better at expressing emotion
  feelings non-verbally

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Non Verbal Skills

• Social eye contact - how much eye contact you
  make in a social situation
• Females look away
• People who look away seem insecure

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Non Verbal Skills

• 1 male and female volunteer to sit in chair
• Hold hands
• Who is leading who?
• Personal Space - women take up less
• Body position - females sit in more restrictive
  posture

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Non Verbal Skills

• (legs crossed) while males sit with legs out
• Space is status (ex bigger office, bigger house)

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Verbal Skills

• Female friendships characterized by sharing
  confidences
• Male friendships characterized by sharing
  activities
• Women value details express concern
  understanding
• Men are socialized to act, not to be concerned

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Verbal Skills

• When women say mmhm they mean Im listening
  while when men say mmhm they mean Im
  agreeing
• Women ask questions to maintain a conversation
• Men ask questions to obtain facts and information

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Verbal Skills

• Masculine - direct or powerful
• Feminine - indirect, powerless (seem weak or less
  convincing)
• Doesnt matter if a person is a male or female
• 4 examples of Feminine Speech Patterns

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Feminine Speech Patterns

• 1. Tag Questions - implies passivity
• Its asking for validation so shows doubt and
  weakness
• EX That was a good movie, wasnt it? or Call
  me back, all right?

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Feminine Speech Patterns

• 2. Qualifiers - words or phrases that soften a
  statement
• EX This may be a stupid question but
• 3. Longer request phrases
• EX Men to secretary - Photocopy this for me
  while Woman would say to secretary

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Feminine Speech Patterns

• When you have the time could you please
  photocopy this for me
• 4. Fillers - suggest discomfort with a topic
• EX Ums, ers, ya know, like