To Collaboration

1
From Conflict

• To Collaboration
• Linda J. Shinn, MBA, RN, CAE
• Consensus Management Group

2
WHAT IS CONFLICT?

• Opposing views
• Opposing options
• Perceived inequities

3
MYTHS ABOUT CONFLICT

• It will eventually go away if ignored
• Confronting the issue or person will be
  unpleasant
• Conflict between colleagues shows a disregard for
  the organization
• If the other person wont cooperate, nothing will
  change

4
DIAGNOSING THE SOURCE

• RELATIONSHIP
• VALUES

• INFORMATION
• STRUCTURE

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MANIPULATION (Kritek)

• Praise and flattery
• Lying and deception
• Helpfulness and generosity
• Trickery and secret deals
• Attacking and threatening

• Deliberate stupidity
• Cuteness and flirtatiousness
• Perseverating
• Withholding
• Obeisance

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RESPONSE TO CONFLICT

• AVOID
• COMPETE
• COMPROMISE
• ACCOMMODATE
• CONFRONT

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AVOID

• DENY A PROBLEM EXISTS
• HEAR THEM SAY I WANT TO THINK ABOUT THIS. (Hope
  this will go away.)

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COMPETE

• TOUGH, LETS GET ON WITH IT.
• THIS FULL SPEED AHEAD APPROACH IS IN SOME
  RESPECTS AVOIDANCE.

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COMPROMISE

• REACTION CAN BE ONE OF DIFFUSION THAT IS
  SUPRRESING THE REAL ISSUES.
• LETS FIND A MIDDLE GROUND.

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ACCOMMODATE

• GIVE IN
• WHATEVER YOU WANT. IT DOES NOT REALLY MATTER TO
  ME.

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CONFRONT

• PEOPLE WHO CONFRONT A CONFLICT WANT A CONCLUSION
  TO THE DISAGREEMENT.
• LETS ADDRESS THIS HEAD ON.

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A CURRENT CONFLICT

• Identify a current conflict
• Prepare to meet - prepare
• Write down conflict in your terms
• Write down all issues that need to be discussed
• Write down out come YOU want
• Repeat from other persons perspective

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Questions? Discussion?
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Who Is Acting Like a Horses

• You
• Others

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What are the opportunities?
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What are the barriers?
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Me Against You to Us Against the Problem

• Agreement on what is the problem
• Active listening to each others views
• Lots of options to resolve the disagreement
• Work through the consequences of each option
• Look for mutual gain
• Put agreed upon solution in writing

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Conflict Procedure

• We have agreement on the issue. It can be
  defined as
• We agree that team members will talk to the other
  person involved if the conflict is between
  several individuals and does not involve the
  team. Our goal is for people to try to solve the
  problem among themselves. We urge parties to get
  help as needed.

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Conflict Procedure (cont)

• We agree to not get in the middle of conflicts
  between individuals and if approached by one
  individual about another we agree to redirect
  that individual to the other person.
• When addressing the conflict we agree to stay in
  neutral focusing on the problem and not the
  people involved.

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Conflict Procedure (cont)

• We agree to listen to understand what is being
  said. We agree to ask questions to understand
  the conflict.
• We agree to work toward a mutually acceptable
  solution to the matter.
• We agree to put solutions in writing.

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Constructive ways of being at an uneven table
(Kritek)

• Find and inhabit deepest and surest human space
  that your capabilities permit
• Be a truth teller
• Honor Your Integrity, even at great cost
• Find a place for compassion at the table
• Draw a line in the sand without cruelty
• Expand and explicate context
• Innovate

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Constructive ways of being at an uneven table
(Kritek)

• Know what you do and do not know
• Stay in the dialogue
• Know when and how to leave the table

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Linda J. Shinn, MBA, RN, CAE

• Lshinn_at_virtualcmg.com
• 317-815-8840

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