The World of Words

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Symbols
Qualities of Symbols
Symbolic Abilities
Arbitrary Abstract Ambiguous
Definition Evaluation Organization Hypothetical
Thought Self-Reflection
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Words are Symbols

• Arbitrarythey are not intrinsically connected to
  what they represent
• Ambiguoustheir meanings are not clear cut or
  fixed
• Abstractthey are not concrete or tangible

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Language and Culture Reflect Each Other

• Language and cultural life are intricately
  interconnected.
• Communication reflects cultural values and
  perspectives.
• As we learn language we also learn the values,
  perspectives, and beliefs of our culture.
• The language we learn shapes how we categorize
  the world.
• Communication changes culture.

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Meanings of Language are Subjective

• Meanings are never self-evident or absolute.
• We construct meaning in the process of
  interacting and through thought.
• Because symbols require interpretation,
  communication is an ongoing process of creating
  meanings.

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Language Use is Rule-Guided

• Communication rules are shared understandings of
  what communication means and what behaviors are
  appropriate in various situations.
• Regulative rules regulate interaction by
  specifying when, how, where, and with whom to
  talk about certain things.
• When is it appropriate to show affection or
  disclose private information.
• Constitutive rules define how certain
  communicative acts are to be interpreted.
• Affection (hugs and kisses)
• Rudeness (interrupting)

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Punctuation of Language Shapes Meaning

• Punctuation defines beginnings and endings of
  interaction episodes.
• When we dont agree on punctuation problems may
  arise.

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The Demand-Withdraw Pattern of Punctuation
I withdraw because you pursue me.
I pursue because you withdraw.
I pursue harder because you withdraw further.
I am withdrawing more because you are pursuing
harder.
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Symbols Define

• Labels shape perception.
• Language reflects our subjective opinion and
  shapes and fixes our perception.
• The labels we apply to people shape how we
  evaluate and respond to them.
• Labels can totalize when we respond to a person
  as if one label totally represents who he or she
  is.

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Symbols Define

• Labels affect relationships.
• The language we use to think about relationships
  affects what happens in them.
• People who use negative labels to describe their
  relationships heighten what is wrong.
• Partners who focus on good facets are more
  conscious of virtues in partners.
• Definitions can create self-fulfilling
  prophecies. Once we select a label we tend to
  see the experience in line with our label.

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Symbols Evaluate

• Values in language reflect and shape perceptions.
• casual messy slob
• assertive aggressive bully
• Loaded language strongly slants perceptions.
• Rush Limbaughs feminazi instead of
  feminist
• geezer or old fogies rather than senior
  citizen

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Symbols Evaluate

• Language can degrade others.
• Hate speech radically dehumanizes others.
• Language is powerful.
• Each of us has an ethical responsibility to guard
  against engaging in uncivil speech as well as not
  tolerating it from others.

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Symbols Organize Perceptions

• Organization of symbols allows us to think about
  abstract concepts such as justice, integrity, and
  good family life.

• Abstracting can distort our thinking by
  stereotyping whole classes of people in a
  generalization.

• We have to generalize to organize our
• thoughts. But we must reflect on
• stereotypes and be alert to differences
• among people.

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Symbols Allow Hypothetical Thought

• We can think beyond immediate, concrete
  situations.
• We live in three dimensions of time.
• We infuse our lives with knowledge of the past
  and plans for the future.
• Personal growth requires that you remember
  yourself at an earlier time, appreciate progress
  made, and keep an ideal image for the future.

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Symbols Allow Self-Reflection

• There are two aspects to selfthe I and the ME.
  (Mead)
• The I acts and the ME reflects and analyzes the
  Is actions.
• Self-reflection allows us to monitor
  communication.
• Self-reflection allows us to manage our image.

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Speech Communities

• A speech community exists when people share norms
  about the use and purposes of talk. They -
• Share perspectives outsiders do not have
• May not understand the communication in other
  communities
• Can explain why cross cultural communication is
  sometimes difficult

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Gendered Speech Communities

• Women and men are socialized into different
  understandings of how communication functions.
• Childrens games are a primary agent of gender
  socialization.
• Girls games such as house involve few players,
  requires talk because there are not rules, and
  depend on cooperation and sensitivity.
• Boys often play organized sports which involve
  more players, have clear rules, and are
  competitive.
• Rules taught in childhood tend to remain with us
  into adulthood.

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• Feminine rules
• Include others. Use talk to show interest in
  others, and respond to their needs.
• Use talk cooperatively. Communication is a joint
  activity people have to work together.
• Use talk expressively. Talk should deal with
  feelings and build relationships.

• Masculine rules
• Assert yourself. Use talk to establish your
  identity, expertise, and knowledge.
• Use talk competitively. Communication is an
  arena for proving yourself, gaining, and holding
  attention.
• Use talk instrumentally. Talk should accomplish
  something such as solving a problem or giving
  advice.

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Engage in Dual Perspective

• Recognize another persons point of view and take
  it into consideration when speaking.
• Understand both our own and anothers point of
  view and give voice to each when we communicate.
• Understanding and hearing others viewpoints
  paves the way for affirming relationships.

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• Using I-language allows you to own your own
  feelings while also explaining to others how you
  interpret their behaviors.

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You-Language
I-Language
You hurt me.
I feel hurt when you ignore what I say.
You make me feel small.
I feel small when you tell me that Im selfish.
Youre so domineering.
When you shout, I feel dominated.
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Rephrase each statement so that it is expressed
using I-language

• You are so arrogant.
• You embarrassed me in front of my friends.
• Youre so understanding about my situation.
• You really are self-centered.

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Abstract to Concrete

• Animal
• Cat
• Scrabbles

abstract
concrete
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Rephrase each statement so that it is less
abstract and more concrete

• Edward always finds something critical to say.
• Most people have lost any sense of personal
  responsibility.
• Lets keep our trip from getting too expensive.

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Qualified Language

• Increases the clarity of communication
• Qualify generalizations to avoid making a general
  statement an absolute one.
• Politicians are crooked.
• A number of politicians have been shown to be
  dishonest.

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Indexing

• Static evaluation refers to assessments that
  suggest something is unchanging.
• Don is irresponsible.

• Indexing reminds us that our evaluation applies
  only to specific times and circumstances.
• On the Task Committee, Don was irresponsible.

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Continuing the Conversation . . .

• View the following video clip and then answer
  the questions that follow based on material
  presented in Chapter 4.

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• How might Ed learn the normative practices of the
  company so that he can understand the meanings
  that long term employees have?
• How do the ambiguity and abstractions that are
  inherent in language explain the
  misunderstandings between Ed and his manager?
• How might you suggest that Ed repair the damage
  done by his absence from the company banquet?
  What might he say to his manager?

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