Forgiveness, Who Does It, and How They Do It

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Forgiveness, Who Does It, and How They Do It

• Michael E. McCullough
• University of Miami
• Coral Gables, Florida

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Forgiveness in the Population (Poloma Gallup,
1991)

• Which do you usually do when you feel that
  someone has deliberately done something wrong to
  you?
• Try to Forgive 48
• Try to Overlook It 45
• Hold Onto Resentment 14
• Try to Get Even 8

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Revenge and Forgiveness in Published Articles,
1900-1990
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The Flight From Tenderness

• Somehow it feels more tough-minded to study
  discord. The scientist fears that if he looks at
  affiliative sentiments he may seem sentimental
  if he talks about love he may seem emotional and
  if he studies personal attachments he may seem
  personal. Better leave the whole matter to poets,
  to saints, or to theologians.
• Gordon W. Allport (1950), A Psychological
  Approach to the Study of Love and Hate

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Forgiveness ?

• Pardon (A Legal Term)
• Condonation (Justifying an offense)
• Excusing (Extenuating circumstances)
• Forgetting (Decay of memory)
• Denial (Motivated Lack of Awareness)
• Reconciliation (Restored Relationship)
• Surrendering Justice Concerns

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Forgiveness Is

• A intrapsychic event occurring in the context of
  an interpersonal transgression
• These transgressions typically elicit negative
  changes in interpersonal motivations (avoidance,
  revenge, benevolence)

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Forgiveness Is

• A intrapsychic event occurring in the context of
  an interpersonal transgression
• Typically elicit negative changes in
  interpersonal motivations (avoidance, revenge,
  benevolence)
• Forgiveness Is Motivational Change
• Increased benevolence, reduced revenge and
  avoidance
• Precedes (and can stimulate) prosocial changes in
  behavior toward the transgressor

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Transgression-Related Interpersonal Motivations
(TRIM) Inventory

• Avoidance
• I keep as much distance between us as
  possible.
• I avoid him/her.
• Benevolence
• I want us to bury the hatchet.
• I want us to have a positive relationship
  again.
• Revenge
• Ill make him/her pay.
• I want to see him/her hurt and miserable.

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Who Does It?

• Agreeableness
• Proneness to Negative Emotions
• Religion/Spirituality

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TRIMs and the Big Five
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How Do They Do It? Empathy is Key
Interventions

Empathy
Forgiveness
Apology



-
Closeness
Rumination
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Forgiveness Implicit Temporal Dynamics

• A motivational transformation. . .
• McCullough, Worthington, Rachal, 1997
• Cancellation of a debt
• Exline Baumeister, 2000
• ...overcoming resentment...and trying to have a
  new stance of benevolence, compassion, and even
  love.
• Subkoviak, Enright, et al., 1995

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A Generalized Model Forgiveness, Forbearance,
and Time
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Forgiveness, Forbearance, and Time
Given a set of TRIMs yij
yij ß0j ß1j(Time) rij
Intercept (ß0j) Initial post-transgression
levels of revenge, avoidance, benevolence
Forbearance.
Slope (ß1j(Time)) linear change in revenge,
avoidance, benevolence Trend Forgiveness.
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Post-Transgression Predictors of Forbearance and
(Trend) Forgiveness
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Temporary Forgiveness?
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Within-Subject Correlates of Temporary Forgiveness
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Forgiveness and Dyadic Satisfaction/ Commitment,
McCullough et al., 1998
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Mathematical Model of Relational Closeness and
Reconciliation
Given a set of measures of closeness/commitment
yij
yij ß0j ß1j(Time) rij
Intercept (ß0j) Initial levels of closeness
and commitment
Slope (ß1j(Time)) change in closeness and
commitment over time Reconciliation.
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Promoting Forgiveness via Group Interventions

• Non-Clinical (lt 6 hrs.) vs. Control Group d
  .24.
• Clinical (gt6 hrs.) vs. Control d .76.
• Importance of empathy promotion

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The Future

• The Well-Being Assumption
• The Self-Report Assumption
• The Physical Health Assumption

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The Well-Being Assumption

• Does Forgiveness Lead to Mental Health and
  Well-Being?
• Cross sectional vs. longitudinal data
• Associative longitudinal growth modeling
• Do forgiveness trajectories predict the unfolding
  of mental health and well-being following
  transgressions?

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The Self-Report Assumption

• Is Self-Report the Best Way to Measure
  Forgiveness? Do self-reports converge with other
  measures?
• Alternatives to Self-Report
• Retributive/avoidant/benevolent behavior in the
  laboratory
• Reductions in facial expressions of negative and
  positive (affiliative) emotion

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Physical Health Assumption

• Does Forgiveness Lead to Physical Health?
• Forgiveness and Physiology
• Forgiveness and Health in Real-Time
• Physiological reactivity to transgression-related
  laboratory challenges
• Cardiovascular reactivity
• Neuroendocrine
• Immunologic

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The Future

• When we imagine a perfect state of being we
  invariably imagine the unconditional triumph of
  love.
• Gordon W. Allport (1950), A Psychological
  Approach to the Study of Love and Hate

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Thank You!