You

1
Youre my Friend
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When you are sad...
I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge
against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
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I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

When you are blue
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I will rag you about it every chance I get.
When you are scared, ...
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I will tell you horrible stories about how much
worse it could be and to quit whining.
When you are worried...
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I will use little words to explain it to your
dumb ass.
When you are confused...
When you are sick
stay away from me until you're well again. I
don't want whatever you have.
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I'll know you finally got laid.
When you smile...
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I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
When you fall, ...
This is my oath I pledge 'till the end. Why
you may ask?Because you're my friend!
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• Send this poem to ten of your closest friends
• and get depressed because you realize you
• only have 2 friends, and one of them is not
  speaking to you right now anyway.