Gendered Lives

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Gendered Lives

• Chapter 7
• Becoming Gendered The Early Years

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Today We Will Discuss

• I. Entering a gendered society
• II. Gendering communication in the family
• III. The personal side of the gender drama

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I. Entering a gendered society

• A. Self-as-object ability to think, reflect,
  and respond to ourselves
• 1st its external
• Next, we internalize
• Their views become key to how see ourselves
• Cooley (1902)Looking Glass Self- the process of
  developing a self-image on the basis of the
  messages we get from others, as we understand
  them.
• 1.We imagine how we appear to others
• 2. We imagine what their judgment of that
  appearance must be
• 3. We develop our self through the judgments of
  others ,some self-feeling, such as pride or
  mortification, as a result of our imagining
  others' judgment.
• Gender is one of first senses of self we develop

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DO YOU WANT TO LOOK DIFFERENTLY TO DIFFERENT
PEOPLE?
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B. Monitoring

• We are able to monitor ourselves
• We observe and regulate our attitudes and
  behaviors
• We are reminded of what others have told us we
  are supposed to think, do, look like, feel
• Personal identity is social
• Influenced by family and society
• Even when we dont identify with prevailing
  social perspectives

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II. Gendering Communication in the Family

• Families are a primary influence on gender
  identity
• A. Unconscious Process Identification and
  Internalization
• 1. Freuds Psychoanalitic Theory
• Anatomy is destiny

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Freuds Birthplace and Childhood home
Pribor, present day Czech Republic
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Sigmund Freud (18561939) Pictured here in
1884
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The Structure of Personality
ID
EGO
SUPEREGO
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The Structure of Personality

• The Id
• Most primitive part of the mind what we are born
  with
• Source of all drives and urges
• Operates according to the pleasure principle and
  primary process thinking

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The Structure of Personality

• The Ego
• The part of the mind that constrains the id to
  reality
• Develops around 2-3 years of age
• Mediates between the id and superego (environment)

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The Structure of Personality

• The Superego
• The part of the mind that internalizes the
  values, morals, and ideals of society
• Develops around age 5

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Sigmund and Anna Freud (1895 1982)
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A. Unconscious Processes Identification
Internalization

• Summarize Freud
• Unconscious dynamics comes from psychoanalytic
  theories
• Persons core identity shaped in early years of
  life
• Biology determines which parent the child will
  identify with
• Will determine how childs psyche develops
• No empirical support for Freuds theory
• More recent scholars say
• Females do not envy penis
• May envy power it symbolizes

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A. Unconscious Processes Identification
Internalization

• 2. Earliest stages of life
• Primary caregiver
• Children of both sexes form first identification
  with adult woman
• Around 3, male and female development diverge
• Cognitive theory
• Girls continue to identify with mother
• Value relationships
• Boys lessen identification with mother
• Value independence

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A. Unconscious Processes Identification
Internalization

• Current Family Trends
• Fathers in our era
• Children of single-parents - difficulty finding
  models of both genders
• Single-father-child discussions tend to be more
  elaborate than

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B. Ego Boundaries

• Ego boundaries the point of which the
  individual stops and rest of world begins
• Linked to gender identity
• Feminine gender identity
• Interconnected
• Masculine gender identity
• Autonomous
• What traits would this perception facilitate???

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How does this perspective impact our
relationships?
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C. Parental Communication about Gender

• This ties in with the social and cognitive theory
• Parents communication towards sons and daughters
  reflect the parents gender stereotypes
• _?_are rewarded for being helpful, nurturing,
  deferential
• At times for being assertive, athletic, smart
• Middle-class Caucasian parents
• Chicano families
• Asian families
• _?_ are rewarded for being competitive,
  independent, assertive

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C. Parental Communication about Gender

• Within 24 hours of birth, parents respond to
  babies in terms of gender
• Boys strong, hardy, big, active, alert
• Girls small, dainty, delicate

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C. Parental Communication about Gender

• Mothers communication focuses on providing
  comfort, security, emotional development
• More emotional talk with their daughters
• Daughters disclose more information to parents
• Fathers encourage gender-appropriate behaviors
• Talk more with daughters
• Engage in more activities with sons

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C. Parental Communication about Gender

• Mothers play with children at childrens level
• Todays fathers are more involved
• Encourage initiative, achievement
• Fathers communication has strong impact on
  self-esteem

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C. Parental Communication about Gender

• Parents also communicate gender expectations
  through toys, clothes, and chores
• Gender socialization more rigid for boys than for
  girls
• Parents who limit toys limit childrens
  development of various ways of thinking and
  interacting

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D. Parental Modeling

• 1. Parents most visible models of masculinity and
  femininity
• a. Families in our era much more diverse
• Single parents provide more multifaceted models
• More women live without a spouse than with one
• 195035
• 2000 49
• 2007 51
• Black women 70
• Hispanic women 49
• Non-Hispanic 55

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b. The Role of the Breadwinner

• 1970 40 of married women worked outside of
  the home
• 2000 the percentage reversed!
• 2007 53 of mothers with infants75 of
  mothers with school-aged children
• 1/2 of white men and 1/3 of black men bring in
  at least 70 of family income
• 30 of women in dual-worker family make more
  money than their male partner

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c. Same-Sex Couples

• Gay and lesbian parents becoming more visible
• 2000 1
• 33 women
• 22 men
• d. Blended families common
• Children can observe more diverse ideas of how
  families can work and gender can be embodied

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e. Parents model attitudes about
gender appearance

• Fathers who workout encourage sons to play sports
• Mothers remark about their weight and eating
  habits
• How do their comments indirectly effect their
  sons and daughters?????
• Children are also listening to parents
  compliments and arguments.
• How does this influence a childs idea of gender?
• Personal gender identity changes over time as
  they develop and interact with diverse people

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III. The personal side of the gender drama

• A. Growing up Masculine (6 themes of masculinity)
• 1. Dont be female
• 2. Be successful
• 3. Be sexual
• 4. Be self-reliant
• 5. Aggression
• 6. Embrace traditional masculine traits but also
  be sensitive and egalitarian

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a. The Downside to Growing Up Masculine

• Men who do not measure up may experience
  depression
• More than 6 million
• Unwilling to seek help due to views of
  masculinity
• Men 4 times more likely to commit suicide

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B. Growing Up Feminine

• 1. Two versions of femininity exist today
• Women now have it all
• It is not possible to have it all
• WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE???

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2. 5 Themes of Femininity

• Appearance still counts
• Be sensitive and caring
• Negative treatment by others
• The age 10 -14
• Be superwoman ?
• There is NO single meaning of feminine anymore

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C. Growing Up Outside Conventional Gender Roles

• For people who do not identify with and perform
  normative gender, sex, sexuality growing up can
  be difficult
• Gay men may be ostracized and Lesbians can be
  scorned
• Transgendered socially isolated
• Up to 3 million
• Hard to find role models
• Hard to find acceptance

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Growing Up Outside Conventional Gender Roles