Perceptions of a Perfectionist

1
Perceptions of a Perfectionist

• A Closer Look into the Relationship Between
  Perception and Perfectionism

By Kim Trinh
2
The Perfect Definition

• Perfectionists people whose standards are high
  beyond reach or reason who strain compulsively
  and unremittingly toward impossible goals and who
  measure their own worth entirely in terms of
  productivity and accomplishment (qtd. in Antony
  Swinson 8).
• Three types of perfectionism self-oriented,
  other-oriented, and socially prescribed
  perfectionism.

3
How Perfectionism and Perception Works

• Self-oriented perfectionism the negative
  perception toward self
• Other-oriented perfectionism the perception that
  others must meet ones expectations to be
  perfect
• Socially prescribed perfectionism the perception
  that others expect one to be perfect

4
Self-oriented Perfectionism

• Tim is this years Associated Student Body
  President. He has to speak in front of a panel of
  student delegates about the upcoming Cultural
  Fair. As he is speaking, he notices that his
  voice is shaking, and his face is turning red.
  Half-way through, he stops, thinking to himself
  about how boring his speech is and how everyone
  must be falling asleep. Tim believes that he is a
  failure when it comes to speaking.
• Meanwhile, without his knowledge, the audience
  thinks Tim is a great speaker. The content of his
  speech is great, and he is making eye contact
  with everyone in the room.

5
About Tims Perception

• Tim holds the perception that he is a bad
  speaker.
• He selects specific cues about his imperfection
  like his voice and the flushed feeling on his
  face.
• Being a perfectionist, Tim only notices his
  negative behaviors and not the positive ones.
• He organizes the cues he picks up from himself
  and those he picks up from the audience and
  infers that some students seem bored because he
  is boring.

6
Tims Perfectionist Tendencies

• Excessive concerns over mistakes Tim pays too
  much attention to his nervous habits and believes
  that they are signs of failure.
• High personal standards Tim believes that he
  should not be nervous and should not bore anyone
  in the audience. The presence of either
  nervousness or boredom means he does not meet his
  standards.

7
Other-oriented Perfectionism

• Lucy is Tims mother. She often complains about
  how unorganized his room is, and goes in and
  picks up his laundry, vacuums the carpet, washes
  the table, etc., at least twice a week. Tim
  promises his mother to clean his room twice a
  month, but Lucy is never pleased with the way her
  son cleans up his mess. His dirty clothes are
  always placed in the wrong basket, the dust in
  the corners is still visible after he vacuums the
  room, his stuffs are never put away in the
  right locations.
• Lucy tells Tim about how he never cares enough to
  clean his room properly.

8
About Lucys Perception

• Lucy believes that her son is an unorganized
  person.
• She selects specific cues to support her point,
  such as the dusty corners, the wrongly placed
  dirty clothes, while paying little attention to
  the fact that other parts of the room are very
  well vacuumed and that his clean clothes are
  always put away in the right location.
• She organizes the selected cues and forms the
  attribution that Tims room is not cleaned up
  properly because he never cares enough to do so
  and not because he does not have enough time to
  have everything spotlessly clean, for example.

9
Lucys Perfectionist Tendencies

• Need for Organization Lucy has the tendency to
  be concerned about neatness, order, and
  organization (Antony Swinson 10). This causes
  her to be inflexible about how certain things
  need to be done, e.g., which basket the dirty
  clothes should be placed in or where Tims items
  should be placed.
• High Parental Criticism Tim perceives his
  mother as being highly critical of his mistakes
  and being unhappy when her expectations are not
  met.

10
Socially Prescribed Perfectionism

• Lisa is Tims younger sister. At school, she
  feels pressured by teachers to be the younger,
  female version of her perfect brother. At home,
  she senses that her mother wants her to be as
  good as Tim, especially at Math. Every night,
  before handing in her Math homework for her
  mother to check, Lisa goes over every problem at
  least three times and re-calculates each one at
  least twice. She doesnt want her mother to think
  that she is any less capable than Tim, so she is
  fearful of making mistakes.

11
Lisas Perfectionist Tendencies

• Lisa selects specific cues like how much her
  mother is pleased with Tims study (rather than
  his cleaning habits) and how often she encourages
  Lisa to spend more time with Math and forms the
  attribution that her mother must want her to be
  good at Math because she expects Lisa to be as
  good as Tim.

12
Lisas Perfectionist Tendencies

• Doubts about actions Lisa is constantly afraid
  of not completing her Math problems correctly,
  and thus she sends an enormous amount of time and
  energy checking and re-checking her work.
• High parental expectations part of the reason
  why Lisa holds doubts about her actions is
  because she feels pressured from others,
  particularly her mother, to perform perfectly.
  She is afraid of not living up to her mothers
  expectation because it might make her a lesser
  person in her mothers eyes.

13
Summary

• Perfectionism is often associated with
  perception.
• People with perfectionist tendencies select
  certain cues that supports the belief that they
  are not living up to the expectations set out for
  them.
• They organize these cues and forms an attribution
  in support of their perfectionist belief.

14
Words Cited

• Antony, Martin M., and Richard P. Swinson. When
  Perfect Isnt Good Enough. Oakland, CA New
  Harbinger P., 1998.
• Stewart, John, Karen E. Zediker, and Saska
  Witteborn. Together Communicating
  Interpersonally, Sixth Ed. Los Angeles Roxbury,
  2005.