We Must Stretch by Stepping Out of Our Comfort Zones

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We Must Stretch by Stepping Out of Our Comfort
Zones
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Goals

• To come to a clearer understanding of what
  stepping out of our comfort zones means and how
  that helps us to get in touch with our potential
• To consider how stretching beyond our comfort
  zones is an effective method for improving our
  self-concept and enjoying high self-esteem

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In vision therapy, what is meant by stretching?
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• We are each gifted with an enormous but unique
  potential.
• However, in our rendezvous with destiny, we have
  to take chances, run risks, get rejected and be
  hurt, be knocked down and get back on our feet.

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• Like an acorn that is potentially an oak tree,
• We have been blessed with the potentiality to
  become our best selves.
• We can do this by deliberately stepping out of
  our comfort zones

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Comfort Zones

• If we are to grow in greater self-appreciation,
  self-acceptance, and self-esteem, then we must
  stretch by stepping out of our comfort zones.
• What is a comfort zone?
• Why do we tend to stay within the confines of our
  comfort zones?

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Fear Gets in the Way

• Fear of Failure
• Fear of Pain and Suffering
• Fear of Rejection

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Comfort Zones

• Comfort zones are
• behaviors,
• emotions,
• thoughts,
• actions,
• and so on that we feel comfortable with

Expressing love
emotions
relationships
hobbies
Giving affirmation
clothes/style
actions
activities
Risks
Personal authenticity
behaviors
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Stretching

• What behaviors, actions, clothing style, or
  emotions are not within your comfort zone?
• Define stretching.
• What are the two qualifications for effective
  stretching?

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Stretching

• The deliberate stepping out of ones comfort
  zone.
• Two qualifications
• Must be right
• Must be reasonable

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Ways To Stretch
Thinking ? Acting
Acting ? Thinking

• Thinking your way into a new way of acting
• Acting your way into a new way of thinking

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Techniques

• Which of the two techniques seem to work best for
  you?
• What happens if your stretch is unsuccessful?
• What are some right and reasonable areas for
  stretching?

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Discussion

• In what area do you feel you need to stretch the
  most?
• The expression of emotions,
• Things you have always wanted to do but have been
  afraid to do,
• Personal authenticity (realness), or
• Starting a new relationship

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Benefits of Stretching
Growth
Expanded Comfort Zone
Awareness of personal potential resulting in
higher self-esteem
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Areas For Stretching

• Expression of Emotions
• Giving a Speech
• Telling Others How Grateful We Are
• Disagreeing With a Teacher
• Speaking Up in Class Even When Silence Would Be
  Better
• Introducing Yourself to A Stranger
• Writing a Letter of Praise Or Protest to a
  Politician
• Personal Authenticity
• Relationships

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Small Stretches which would be most profitable
for you to do at this time

• Taking a nap
• Making a list of things to do, and sticking to it
• Doing a favor for someone anonymously
• Trying something you might fail at

• Writing a poem or song
• Offering a genuine compliment or affirmation
• Saying no to a request without giving into guilt
  feelings

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Why do we procrastinate?
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Prescription for Procrastinators

• Attitude is wrong youll never feel like doing
  what you dont enjoy.
• Therefore, follow this formula
• Action leads to the proper mood and enthusiasm.
• What we will discover is that our very activity
  will generate enthusiasm in us and increase our
  motivation.

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The Road Less Traveled (Scott Peck, M.D.)

• Life is difficult (painful to confront problems).
• Discipline is the basic set of tools needed to
  solve problems.
• Four Disciplines are
• a. delaying gratification
• b. accepting responsibility
• c. dedication to truth
• d. balancing
• The will to use them is LOVE

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Delaying Gratification

• A process of scheduling the pain and pleasure of
  life in such a way as to enhance the pleasure by
  meeting and experiencing the pain first and
  getting it over with.
• Its the only decent way to live.

• Approaches
• 1. Problems must be worked through because they
  do not go away.
• 2. Confront problems by taking time and planning.

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Accepting Responsibility

• Remember Our actions and reactions are caused by
  something in us
• We must learn to accept full responsibility for
  our lives.
• Focus on the Circle of Influence (that which you
  can change, i.e, YOURSELF)
• Dont be a bystander carpe diem stand up and
  make a difference

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Dedication to Truth

• The willingness to revise and correct our
  understanding or reality our world map.
• Be open to challenge the truth of reality.
• Be free from fear.
• Dont live in a world or if onlys and I
  cant.
• Live out the Serenity Prayer.

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http//www.addictions.org/serenity.htm
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Balancing

• Learn to be flexible
• Be open to growth
• Balance your needs with the needs of others

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Painful Roads to Travel

• Birth
• Childhood
• Play Years
• School years
• Adolescence
• Young Adulthood
• Midlife
• Senior

• Trust (mistrust)
• Autonomy (doubt)
• Socialization (guilt)
• Independence inferiority)
• Individuation (identity confusion)
• Partnership (isolation)
• Generativity (stagnation)
• Ego identity (despair)

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Review

• To become fully human and alive, to grow in
  self-acceptance and self-esteem, and to
  experience personal growth, we must stretch
  everyday.

• Stretching improves the odds of not wasting the
  90 of our potential that we never use.
• Remember growth is a gradual process, not a
  sudden and immediate process.

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Stretching Assignment

• Due Date November 7, 2006
• Choose any five stretches.
• Label each stretch as given in italicized font
• Give date completed or attempted
• Describe what happened, who was involved, and how
  it was a stretch out of your comfort zones.

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Assignment

• Read Chapter 12, We Must Seek Growth, Not
  Perfection