Parents and the Mentor Program

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Parents and the Mentor Program

• Creating a partnership for your students success

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What Generation are You?

• Baby Boom Generation
• Born 40-60
• Memorable events
• Assassination of JFK and Martin Luther King
• Civil rights movement
• Woodstock, Jack Kerouac
• Vietnam War, Watergate
• Other Boomers
• Bill Clinton, George W Bush, Mick Jagger, Jerry
  Sienfeld, Oprah Winfrey

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What Generation are You?

• Generation X
• Born 60-80
• Memorable events
• Fall of Berlin Wall, Rise of Right-wing politics
• End of cold war
• Punk rock and grunge music
• Increase in divorce rates
• Increase in mothers in the workplace
• Other Xers
• Sandra Bullock, Andre Agassi, Barack Obama,
  Pierre Omidyar, Sergey Brin and Larry Page

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The Millennials(or Generation Y)

• Born after 1981
• Memorable events
• 9/11
• Digital and Internet-driven world
• MTV
• Columbine school events
• Iraq War
• Hurricane Katrina
• Other Millennials
• Prince William, Justin Timberlake, Paris Hilton,
  YOUR CHILDREN!

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Core Traits of Millennial College Students
Millennials are accustomed to being the focus of
their parents and the nations attention
Special
Millennials are the product of a time where
protection and safety of young people is at an
all-time high bike helmets, seat belts,
Columbine 9-11
Sheltered
Millennials have gotten the message that they can
do anything and often try high level of trust
optimism, trust in parents
Confident
Millennials are connected to one another via
classroom learning, teamwork, and technology
More comfortable with uniformity cell phones,
IM, Facebook
Team-Oriented
Most Millennials trust their parents, identify
with their values, and embrace tradition
Conventional
Millennials have been pushed to a fine line of
being over-involved, over-scheduled, and
over-expected Multi-tasking
Pressured
Millennials are on track to be the smartest
best educated generation
Achieving
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7 Tips for Parents of Millennial College Students
Give students space to find themselves as an
individual their place in the world - Let Go
Special
Sheltered
Have your student take responsibility for their
personal issues educational experience
Confident
Help your student keep a level head Be
realistic about college being hard work
Team-Oriented
Communicate the importance of making the best
decision for themselves- even if it goes against
the group Encourage them to be leaders
original Let go of their HS world
Permit your student to challenge and question
beliefs
Conventional
Promote balance in your students life by
insisting that they remain active engaged in
campus life They have geared their entire life
on getting into college
Pressured
Achieving
Encourage your students holistic development
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Are you a Helicopter Parent?
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Question 1 How often do you plan to talk to
your son/daughter on the phone?

• Once a week
• Two or three times per week
• Once a day
• Several times each day
• As often as I need until I run out of minutes
• Parents would do equally well to cut the
  electronic umbilical cord once their kids move
  out of the house. A daily call is acceptable,
  but calling so often that your son/daughter is
  spending more time on the phone with you than
  experiencing the freedom of college life is not.
• Amy Tiemann, PhD., Mojo Mom

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Question 2 Your son/daughter hates his/her
roommate. What do you do?

• Remind your student of other times he/she has
  successfully solved problems.
• Have him/her talk to their RA.
• Storm the Residential Life Office. You want to
  know what on earth is being done about this!
• Call the roommates parents and let them have it!
• Take a leave of absence from your job for one
  week so that you can drive to SHU in a moments
  notice!
• Unless there is a genuine crisis involving
  serious health and well-being issues, parents
  should not intervene in academic and residential
  issues. This means staying OUT of roommate
  arguments
• Amy Tiemann, PhD., Mojo Mom

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Questions 3Your son/daughter is having trouble
writing a paper. What do you do?

• You listen. You sympathize.
• Suggest your son/daughter make appointments with
  the professor and the Learning Center.
• Read whats been written so far and give
  suggestions.
• Get a copy of his or her assignment and write the
  whole thing.
• Call or write the professor and tell him you
  think the assignment is too hard (I mean, your
  child never had this problem in high school!)
• One way to tell the difference between
  helicopter behavior and just being helpful is to
  ask yourself if your child can do for herself
  what you are doing for her
• Michael Zentman, PhD, Adelphi University

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Question 4 Your son/daughter is responsible
for a minor conduct violation. What do you do?

• You take an aspirin and discuss the consequences
  of inappropriate behavior with your child.
• Show up on your childs doorstep.
• Barge into the Dean of Students office and
  demand to be shown video proof of the violation.
  
• Call the president. You play a lot of
  tuitionyour kid should be let off the hook.
• When parents over-function for their kids,
  their kids often accommodate by
  under-functioning.
• Boyce Watkins, The Parental 411

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FamilyEducationalRights PrivacyAct
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The Mentor Program
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3-Pronged Approach
Individual meetings
MENTOR
Encourage participation outside the classroom
Team approach with Academic Advisors
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What Else We Do

• Start with the Arts
• House Calls
• Straight from the Heart Day
• Peer Mentor Programs
• Sophomore Leadership Panel
• Special Speakers

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What We Dont Do

• Find Work-Study jobs
• Academic Advising
• Do for the students
• We are a RESOURCE for students Educate,
  Enable, Equip

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Dealing with Drop-Off Day

• Dont count on having a meaningful good-bye once
  you get to campus. Talk beforehand about
• Finances
• How often to be in touch (try email/IM)
• Academic expectations
• Reactions will vary
• -Nervous remind him of all hes accomplished
  and focus on the next task
• -Confident Allow her to disappear and get
  absorbed in her new environment
• -Let your spouse have his/her own emotions
• Utilize college staff for help/questions

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Start with the ArtsAugust 24-30, 2008

• For Whom?
• Any incoming freshman interested in the arts and
  in coming early to campus
• When?
• The week before move-in day
• What is it?
• 5 days of fun arts-related activities on campus,
  around CT, and in NYC
• How do I sign up?
• Refer to the Start with the Arts brochure in
  your folder apply online by JUNE 28, 2008

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Were Here for You!

• The Student Mentor Staff

Recite this MantraGo ask your Mentor.