Maryanne Vorreiter

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2009 DPC Keynote Address Happy Kids Happy
Families

• Maryanne Vorreiter
• NSW Project Officer - MindMatters

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Acknowledgement of CountryWe would like to
acknowledge the traditional custodians of this
land and pay our respects to the Elders past,
present and future for they hold the memories,
the traditions, the culture and hopes of
Indigenous Australia.
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Mental Health

• A holistic sense of wellbeing
• Emotional and spiritual resilience which
  enables us to enjoy life and survive pain,
  disappointment and sadness. It is a positive
  sense of well-being and an underlying belief in
  our own and others dignity and worth.
• Health Education Authority, 1998 England

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• If researchers study only family problems, they
  are likely to find only family problems.
• Similarly, if educators, community organisers,
  therapists and researchers are interested in
  family strengths, are identified, they can become
  the foundation for continued growth and positive
  change in a family and a society.
• John DeFrain,
  2000

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What is resilience?

• Resilience is the ability to bounce back from,
  and successfully adapt to, adversity.
• Bonnie Benard
• http//www.resiliency.com/htm/whatisresiliency.htm
  

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What is Family Resilience

• The ability of the family to withstand setbacks
  and crises, to adapt to changing circumstances,
  and to have a positive attitude towards the
  challenges of life.

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Brainstorm Activity

• How do you bounce back and show your kids how to
  bounce back?

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Risk and Protective Factors

• Risk factors are the circumstances or experiences
  which increase the possibility of a person
  developing a mental health problem or illness
• Protective factors reduce the likelihood that a
  person will develop mental health problems

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Protective factors

• Having a supportive relationship with at least
  one adult
• Safe and positive routines and rules
• Being valued and encouraged
• Having realistic and positive goals
• Opportunity to be involved in family in a real
  way
• Being encouraged to be appropriately independent
• Able to communicate with others and solve problems

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Have a conversation

• Developing independence in our children
• What do you do for your kids that they can do for
  themselves?
• Action Hand over one responsibility this week

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Qualities of resilient families

• Resilience

• Appreciation and Affection
• Commitment
• Positive communication
• Enjoyable time together
• Spiritual well-being
• Successful management of stress and crisis

http//family.jrank.org/pages/594/Family-Strengths
-Qualities-Strong-Families.html
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How to promote resilience

• Look at ways you can build up protective factors
  and work on the qualities of resilient families
• Nourish your own resilience and wellbeing
• Andrew Fuller 2000 Raising Real People
• Talking point- How you nourish your own
  resilience and well-being

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Ten Hints for creating resilient families

• Promote belonging
• Have some mooch time
• Rediscover some family rituals
• Spontaneity and Curiosity
• Love kids for their differences
• It is clear who is in charge
• Consistency
• Teach the skills of self esteem
• Know how to argue
• Be reliably unpredictable

http//www.andrewfuller.com.au/free/AndrewsTenResi
lienceHints.pdf
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The How of Happiness

• Gratitude
• Social connection
• Living in the present
• Committing to your goals
• Taking care of your body and your soul

Sonja Lyubomirsky The How of Happiness, a
practical guide to getting the Life you want. 2007
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Activities to make you feel better

• Write about a time you were at your best and
  reflect of the personal strengths displayed in
  the story.
• Three good things in life write three things
  that went well each day and their causes
• Write a letter of gratitude to someone who had
  been especially kind to you but had not been
  properly thanked
• Do something kind for some one else without
  letting them know who it was
• Contact a friend you have not spoken to for some
  time
• Go for a walk and see how many beautiful things
  you can see around you
• Give some thing to someone else a smile, blood,
  a chocolate frog, some time
• Set goals in your life that are intrinsic,
  authentic, approach orientated, harmonious,
  activity based, flexible
• Say STOP or NO when over thinking, ruminating,
  and comparing yourself with others. Let it go,
  tomorrow is a new day, new start
• Activities from Authentic happiness The How of
  Happiness

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• I am done with great things and big plans,
  great institutions and big successes. I am for
  those tiny invisible loving human forces that
  work from individual to individual, creeping
  through the crannies of the world.

William James
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Website links

• www.andrewfuller.com.au
• www.parentingideas.com.au