Listening

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Listening

• Listening well is as powerful a means of
  communication and influence as to talk well.
• - John Marshall, former Chief Justice of the U.S.
  Supreme Court

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Listening

• Every person in this life has something to teach
  me -- and as soon as I accept that, I open myself
  to truly listening.
• - Catherine Doucette, Author

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Listening Versus Hearing

• Listening
• An active process of receiving aural stimuli
  consisting of five stages.
• Hearing
• To perceive sound by the ear.

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Purposes and Payoffs of Listening

• Learning
• Relating
• Influencing
• Playing
• Helping

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Stages of Listening

• Receiving
• Understanding
• Remembering
• Evaluating
• Responding

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1. Receiving

• Focus Attention on Speakers Verbal
• Non-Verbal
• Avoid Distractions
• Focus on Speaker, Not What Youll Say Next
• Avoid Interrupting

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2. Understanding

• Relate New Information to What You Know
• See Speakers Point of View
• Ask Questions
• Paraphrase

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3. Remembering

• Take Notes
• Memory is not Reproductive
• Memory is Reconstructed

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4. Evaluating

• Resist Premature Evaluation
• Give Speaker Benefit of the Doubt
• Distinguish Facts from Inferences
• Identify Speakers Biases and/or Prejudices

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5. Responding

• Support the Speaker with Back-Channeling
• Express Support
• Respond Honestly Even in Disagreement
• Own Your Responses
• Supportive Atmosphere

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Why Listen?

• By far, the one skill mentioned most often by
  employers is the ability to listen, write, and
  speak effectively.
• -Randall Katharine Hansen,
• Employment Experts

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Problem-Causing Listening

• The Static Listener
• The Monotonous Feedback Giver
• The Overly Expressive Listener
• The Reader/Writer

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Problem-Causing Listening

• The Eye Avoider
• The Preoccupied Listener
• The Waiting Listener
• The Thought Completing Listener

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Kinds of Listening

• Emphatic and Objective
• Critical and Non-Judgmental
• Surface and Depth
• Active and Inactive

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Empathic and Objective

• Punctuate from Speakers Point of View
• Equal, Two-Way Conversations
• Seek to Understand Thoughts and Feelings
• Avoid Offensive Listening

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Critical Listening

• Keep Open Mind
• Avoid Filtering or Oversimplifying
• Recognize Own Biases
• Avoid Uncritical Listening

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Critical Listening

• Recognize Fallacies
• Name-calling
• Testimonials
• Bandwagon
• Agenda-setting
• Attack

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Surface and Depth Listening

• Focus on Verbal and Nonverbal
• Listen for Content and Relational Messages
• Note Statements that Refer Back to Speaker
• Dont Disregard Literal Meanings

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Active and Inactive Listening

• Paraphrase Speakers Meaning
• Express Understanding of Speakers Feelings
• Ask Questions

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Culture, Gender, and Listening

• Language and Accents
• Nonverbal Differences
• Differences in Style
• Stories vs. Evidence
• Credibility and Feedback