Friendships: Parting Ways for Spiritual Reasons

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Friendships Parting Ways for Spiritual Reasons
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A Box of Friendship
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Good friendships are built with respect, trust,
truthfulness, courtesy, honesty, understanding,
sympathy, joy, love, and a shared passion.
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There can be no greater shared passion than a
love for Christ and the hope of heaven.
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Things that might cause friends to separate for
spiritual reasons

• Weights
• Unhealthy dialogue
• Mistrust
• Compromise
• Temptation
• Sin

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Weights
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ScenarioTwo women are best friends. One is
married and has children. The other is married
and has no children. The two love traveling
together and frequently have ventures to other
cities. The Christian mother begins to question
the length of time away from her family and
church. What should she do?
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ScenarioA Christian lady and her friend love
to play card games. However, card night becomes
sacred, and more frequent. She knows there are
good works she could do, but game nights with
her friend are such fun. What should she do?
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ScenarioA Christian lady and her friend share
a passion for shopping. Their shopping trips have
been a great source of enjoyment. However, they
spend more and more time at the Mall, or outlets.
Shopping becomes the primary focus and passion.
Her friend will never give it up. What should
she do?
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In each case, the women are involved in
activities that, in and of themselves, are not
wrong. But they gradually become weights that
draw their focus and energy away from the
Christian race.
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Weights can become sin! Scripture tells us to
lay aside every weight that easily ensnares us
(Hebrews 121).
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Unhealthy dialogue
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ScenarioTwo women have a good working
friendship. They share common interests (like
crafts, teaching, or creating lively bulletin
boards). But increasingly one woman realizes that
the other woman is apt to talk in very negative
ways, complaining about this or that or about
him or her, until she, too, begins grumbling.
What should she do?
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Behold, the Lord comes with ten thousands of
his holy ones, to execute judgment on all and to
convict all the ungodly of all their deeds of
ungodlinessthese are grumblers, malcontents
Jude vs. 14-16
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Paul admonished Christians, Do all things
without grumbling or questioning Philippians
214
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Mistrust
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ScenarioUnable to sort through a difficult
situation, a woman confides in her friend.
Later she finds that the friend told one or two
others about the matter. She feels wounded and
betrayed. What should she do?
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Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who
repeats a matter separates close friends
Proverbs 179
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Along with keeping confidences, qualities like
truthfulness, courtesy, and honesty are key
ingredients that build trust in a friend.
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Now Paul and his companions set sail from Paphos
and came to Perga in Pamphylia. And John left
them and returned to Jerusalem. Acts 1313
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Now Barnabas wanted to take with them John
called Mark. But Paul thought best not to take
with them one who had withdrawn from them in
Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the
work. Acts 1536-41
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And there arose a sharp disagreement, so that
they separated from each other. Barnabas took
Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus, but Paul
chose Silas and departed.
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When there is seemingly no resolution in a
matter, the best course may be that friends part
peacefully and work separately.
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Compromise
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ScenarioA preacher and his wife become friends
with a coworker and his wife. The coworker
engages in an unethical practice and talks openly
about it when they have couples night out.
What should they do?
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ScenarioA group of Christian couples meet
regularly and value their friendship. But one
couple is concerned about unChristlike
gossip/slander during the get-togethers. The
group (4-5 couples) considers this behavior
normal. What should the couple do?
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One cannot straddle the fence between good and
evil, because Satan owns the fence.
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All too often unethical behavior, gossip, and
slander are ignored among friends.
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They were filled with all manner of
unrighteousnessThey are full of envy, murder,
strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips,
slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty,
boastfulfaithless, heartless, ruthless.
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Though they know God's decree that those who
practice such things deserve to die, they not
only do them but give approval to those who
practice them. Romans 129-32
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Temptation
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ScenarioA woman enjoys the blessings of
friendship with another woman, until her friend
asks her to cover for her, or stretch the
truth about a matter. What should she do?
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ScenarioTwo women are friends. One is a
Christian, and one is not. But lately, the
Christian woman has become entangled in her
friends social nightlife. What should she do?
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Nothing is hidden from Gods eyes.Ps. 3313
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Each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his
own desires and enticed James 114
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Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the
devil, and he will flee from you James 47
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Abstain from every form of evil. 1 Thess.
522
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Sin
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ScenarioSeveral Christian couples are
steadfast friends, until the husband of one
couple becomes attracted to the wife of another
couple. What should they do?
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ScenarioTwo women are good friends. One
confides in the other that she began talking to
an old boyfriend, and recently went to visit
him.What should her friend do?
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When desire has conceived, it gives birth to
sin and sin, when it is full-grown, brings
forth death James 115
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Sin separates friends, but more importantly,
sin separates one from God. Isaiah 592
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if anyone is caught in any transgression, you
who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit
of gentleness Galatians 61
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If a friendship is threatened with weights,
unhealthy dialogue, mistrust, compromise,
temptation, or sin, it is time for an
assessment.
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Loyalty and emotion should not guide our
actions.
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God should be our guide in all things,
especially the maintenance and care of our very
special box of friendship.