SELFESTEEM

1
SELF-ESTEEM

• CONECTIONS BETWEEN PARENTS AND CHILDREN

2

• Self esteem
• Self Concept Self Image

3
THE 5 COMPONENTS OF SELF ESTEEM

• Security

4
Selfhood
5
Mission
6
Affiliation
7
Competence
8
How is the environment that invites to a better
self esteem?

• Caring
• Supportive
• Secure
• Warm
• Nonthreatening
• Trusting

• Comfortable
• Nonjudgmental
• Accepting
• Encouraging
• Inviting

9
homes of those individuals with High self esteem

• Experience love that expresses respect, concern
  and acceptance. They are accepted with their
  strengths and capacities as well as with their
  limitations and weaknesses. Clearly love with no
  strings attached, say this staments is crucial
  as some families or some parents feel and act
  like they own each other.
• Parents are not too permissive. There were clear
  and defined boundaries, standards and
  expectations, and therefore children felt secure.
• The family functions with a high degree of
  democracy. Children are encouraged to present
  their own ideas and opinions for discussion.

10
Effective environments are those where children

• Perceive a sense of warmth and love
• Are offered a degree of security that allows them
  to grow and try new things
• Are respected individuals
• Are encouraged to have ideas and opinions
• Recognize that there are clear and definite
  limits
• Are given rules and standards that are reasonable
• Have a chance to succeed at their own levels
• Are accepted and have a sense of freedom at the
  same time

11
Building security

• Possible indicators of weak security
• Avoids situations or environments
• Withdraws from close physical contact even with
  known persons
• Does not trust others, hesitates or avoids
  forming close personal attachments
• Exhibits stress or anxiety symptoms
• Displays fear
• Is uncomfortable with new experiences
• Does not know who to count on

12
Building security II

• Possible indicators of strong security
• Knows who to count on and trust
• Generally feels safe and secure, and therefore
  risks separating from the source of security
• Display few symptoms of anxiety and stress
• Has formed a trusting, personal relationship with
  a significant other
• Is comfortable with close physical contact from
  known persons
• Handles change and spontaneity with relative ease

13
Build a trusting Relationship

• ACCEPTANCE
• They like me for what I am and not for what I
  should be
• People are accepted not only for their strengths
  but also for their weaknesses

14
RESPECT

• My ideas are important and count
• Being heard by adults.

15
REALNESS

• I am real and unique
• Open up and show our true colours and feelings.
  To show our own self

16
REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

• Adults need to know their children strengths and
  weaknesses and know what they are capable of.
  Once they know their capabilities, adults have to
  believe children can learn and succeed.
• Expectations set to the children have to be
  realistic in comparison with chronological
  expectations, but beyond than that, with
  individual capacities.

17
REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS II

• Give praised and complement when deserved
• The effective praised
• Deserved
• Immediate
• Behaviour-centered
• Individual
• Specific
• Repeated
• Spontaneous

18
ACTIVITY ONE

• Interview each other
• Where did you grow up? Is that place different
  now?
• What is the hardest thing about school?
• What is the easier one?
• How was going to school then different than now
• Who was your favorite teacher? Why?
• What was your favorite subject?
• Tell me about your hobbies or interests?

19
ACTIVITY TWO

• Letter to a significant other
• Think of someone that is special to you and you
  want to let that person know how special he/she
  is. Think carefully why that person and what you
  want to tell.

20
BUILDING SELFHOOD

• Possible indicators of weak selfhood
• Frequently uses negative statements regarding
  self and others
• Embarrasses easily, oversensitive to criticism
• Lacks of confidence in physical self or necessary
  physical skills
• Is dependent on adults, anxious to please them
• Is uncomfortable with praise denies , disregards
  or becomes embarrassed
• Mimics or imitates others, it is unwilling to
  express self in own way or being risk to be
  different
• May seek acknowledgment for negative
  characteristics

21
BUILDING SELFHOOD II

• Possible indicators of strong selfhood
• Handles fine and gross motor activities with ease
• Expresses uniqueness and individuality, risks
  being different
• Has an accurate self-description in terms of
  physical characteristics, capabilities, roles and
  attitudes
• General makes positive statements of self and
  others
• Identifies and expresses emotions appropriately
• Is comfortable accepting praise

22
BUILDING SELFHOOD III

• As parents
• Encourage the use of I-statements
• Reinforce accurate self-descriptions
• Provide opportunities to discover sources of
  influence
• Build an awareness of unique qualities
• Enhance ability to identify and express emotions

23
ACTIVITY III

• With the help of a partner. Draw your hands on a
  piece of paper and write down the description
  your friend makes about you.

24
ACTIVITY IV

• Self portrait

25
BUILDING AFFILIATION

• Possible indicators of weak affiliation
• Has difficulty initiating or maintaining
  friendship
• Connects with objects rather than people
• Is easily influenced by others
• Isolates self from groups, appears to be lonely
• Is umconfortable working within groups which may
  trigger behaviours such as withdrawal, bullying,
  showing-off, being silly
• Ridicules or reject others, being insensitive to
  their emotions and needs
• Feels that others dont value him/her
• Relies on adult companionship

26
BUILDING AFFILIATION II

• Possible indicators of strong affiliation
• Understand the concept of friendship
• Shows sensitivity and compassion toward others
• Demonstrates ability to cooperate and share
• Is comfortable in group settings
• Easily achieves peer acceptance and is looked for
  by others
• Demonstrate appropriate social skills
• Feels valued by others

27
BUILDING AFFILIATION III

• As parents
• Parents can promote social contact and encourage
  acceptance of differences amongst the members of
  the group
• Provide opportunities to discover interests,
  capabilities and backgrounds of others
• Model possitive and effective ways of making
  friends
• Encourage peer support

28
BUILDING MISSION

• Mission is a feeling of purpose and motivation
  in life. Setting realistic and achiveable goals
  and being willing to take responsibility for the
  consequences of ones own decisions.

29
BUILDING MISSION II

• Possible indicators of weak mission
• Lacks motivation or innitiave sometimes happens
  but if it is perssitant, there is something
  wrong.
• Cannot see alternatives or solutions
• Feels powerless, therefore may exhibit
  attention-getting negative behaviour
• Appears aimless or without direction
• Rarely succeds due to poor goal-setting
• Is over dependent on others and feels incapable
  of being in charge
• Avoids taking responsibility for own actions
• Indecisive

30
BUILDING MISSION III

• Possible indicators of strong mission
• Apeears with proposes and clear sense direction
• Is self directed and takes innitiatives
• Takes responsibilities for his/her own actions
• Seeks alternative solutions to problems
• Sets achievable and realistic goals

31
BUILDING MISSION IV

• Several studies show that feeling able to conduct
  your own life and decisions enhances self esteem
  and raises accademic performance
• As parents
• Enhance ability ti make decisions, seek
  alternatives and identify consequences
• Model steps to set goals succesfully
• Become involve in accademic achievement and avoid
  being too punitive when they fail.
• Also be aware of your own expectation and the
  goals you set for them

32
ACTIVITY V

• Problems
• Goals-setting

33
BUILDING COMPETENCE

• A feeling of success and accomplishment in
  things regarded as important or valuable. Aware
  of stregthns and able to accept weaknesses

34
BUILDING COMPETENCE II

• Possible indicators of weak competence
• Is reluctant to contribute ideas or opinions
• Is unwilling to take risks
• Acts as if helpless and is dependent in areas
  where he/she can or should be competent
• Acts out in areas where he/she feels incompetent
  by displaying frustration, withdrawal, lack of
  participation, resisting, daydreaming, cheating
• Does not attempt many tasks because of fear of
  failure or insecurity
• Is a poor loser magnifies loss
• Uses negative self-statements

35
BUILDING COMPETENCE III

• Possible indicators of strong competence
• Seeks out challenges, takes risks
• Accepts weaknesses and uses mistakes as learning
  tools
• Is aware of strenghts and possitive
  characteristics
• Generally feels succesful
• Shares opinion and ideas
• Display good sportmanship
• Recognizes accomplishments and achivements

36
BUILDING COMPETENCE IV

• As parents
• Provide opportunities to increase awareness of
  individual strenghts
• Teach how to record progress
• Provide feedback and model how to accept defeat
  and mistakes
• Teach self praise for achivement